Love to all & May our Lord bless!
Thursday, November 25, 2010
Thursday, November 18, 2010
Friday, October 29, 2010
A new day
A new day...a new way to look at things.
Yesterday I had to go for a phlebotomy, and after trying 4 veins and getting only 50cc
of the needed 250cc the nurses decided to call it quits. My veins it seems, are old and tired. Like the rest of me some days.
While I was there, a nurse called my hemotologist's nurse and she said an appointment would be set up for me soon to have a Picc line put in. This gives long term access to a vein near the heart and the sight for putting that in is usually the upper arm. You nurses will know what I'm talking about.
I've known this was coming, so why did it affect me the way it did? Because while we say we know something might 'some day' come, when it's reality, it's a different story.
While I was at the cancer center, I commented to the nurse that all you have to do is look around to find someone in worse shape than you are. Her answer to me was "but then again, most cancers are treated and people go on with their lives ... when you have a chronic, life-long condition, it's often harder to deal with" ...
Chronic and life-long ... that's what I have, two conditions actually. Sometimes I wish that chemo or radiation could help them. Then I could get on with my life!
But it is what it is and while I've prayed and asked God to take them away, or at least make them less bothersome, the answer I get is that His grace is sufficient. And I can honestly say that I am learning that for perhaps the first time in my life. And it isn't my life I need to get on with either...it's living to bring glory to Him. That's all that matters. When I am weak, then I am strengthened with His grace and that's all I need.
Today is a new day...His mercies are new this morning! He gives strength for us when we need it, not before. And how would we ever know we need it, if we weren't weak?
Blessings friends! We're almost Home.
Yesterday I had to go for a phlebotomy, and after trying 4 veins and getting only 50cc
of the needed 250cc the nurses decided to call it quits. My veins it seems, are old and tired. Like the rest of me some days.
While I was there, a nurse called my hemotologist's nurse and she said an appointment would be set up for me soon to have a Picc line put in. This gives long term access to a vein near the heart and the sight for putting that in is usually the upper arm. You nurses will know what I'm talking about.
I've known this was coming, so why did it affect me the way it did? Because while we say we know something might 'some day' come, when it's reality, it's a different story.
While I was at the cancer center, I commented to the nurse that all you have to do is look around to find someone in worse shape than you are. Her answer to me was "but then again, most cancers are treated and people go on with their lives ... when you have a chronic, life-long condition, it's often harder to deal with" ...
Chronic and life-long ... that's what I have, two conditions actually. Sometimes I wish that chemo or radiation could help them. Then I could get on with my life!
But it is what it is and while I've prayed and asked God to take them away, or at least make them less bothersome, the answer I get is that His grace is sufficient. And I can honestly say that I am learning that for perhaps the first time in my life. And it isn't my life I need to get on with either...it's living to bring glory to Him. That's all that matters. When I am weak, then I am strengthened with His grace and that's all I need.
Today is a new day...His mercies are new this morning! He gives strength for us when we need it, not before. And how would we ever know we need it, if we weren't weak?
Blessings friends! We're almost Home.
Thursday, October 21, 2010
Prayer need...
Another prayer need:
My cousin David and his son Jason. Jason has severe lupus and has been hospitalized for the past two months, getting home yesterday. He's a young man, unable to work due to health issues.
My cousin David and his son Jason. Jason has severe lupus and has been hospitalized for the past two months, getting home yesterday. He's a young man, unable to work due to health issues.
Thursday, October 14, 2010
Prayer needs
Additional prayer requests:
Don in Ky - Going to a doctor in Lexington today, Oct. 14, think he may have had a stroke
(This is my Mom's brother-in-law)
Mildren in Indiana - Having another skin graft on her leg
(Mom's half-sister)
Norma in Kentucky - Dealing with cervical cancer
Brian in Michigan - Admitted to hospice - Dementia; pray for his wife Pauline also
Don in Ky - Going to a doctor in Lexington today, Oct. 14, think he may have had a stroke
(This is my Mom's brother-in-law)
Mildren in Indiana - Having another skin graft on her leg
(Mom's half-sister)
Norma in Kentucky - Dealing with cervical cancer
Brian in Michigan - Admitted to hospice - Dementia; pray for his wife Pauline also
Wednesday, October 13, 2010
I'm back, thank the good Lord.
Dear Ones,
What a journey I've been on since I last wrote anything.
As some of you know, I suffered a stroke, actually bilateral strokes, on July 10. The day I came home from the hospital from the first time I had been there. I was admitted on July 5 for the pain. On July 7 I had a scope put into my stomach to see what was going on there...turned out I had non-erosive gastritis; then the spinal nerve block on July 8 to help with the foot pain (and it did, praise the Lord!).
I was released July 10, had been home about 3 hours, and while my husband went to the market I called my Mom. And just like that, I couldn't talk....it happened so quickly. She knew what was happening, and called our son Shawn who lives just 4 houses from us. He called 911 and then went to get his Dad. His wife stayed here with me.
The next thing I knew the fire rescue squad was here and they took me to a local hospital. I was transferred last that night to Henry Ford Hospital downtown. I can remember some things, others not so much.
An MRI was done late Sunday nite and it showed bilateral strokes, with things going every-which way in my brain. I couldn't talk and my right side was affected...I didn't know the severity of it and I'm glad I didn't.
There is so much I could write and perhaps I will, later on. I am blessed to tell you that I have regained my speech, albeit slowly at times. But that' s okay...slow is good. My speech therapist said that we have a tendency to talk too fast anyway. After leaving the main hospital, I was transferred to Wyandotte Rehab and spent a full week there. Most of my body has returned...some parts are numb and weak, but I can live with that also. "When we are weak, then He is strong" ... I've truly learned what that means.
As I said, there is much I could write, but mostly I want to share prayer requests with you:
#1. My neighbor, MaryAnn, is battling 3 types of cancer
#2. Tony & his wife Margaret & their daughters ... a rough family situation
#3. My nephew Jason...is still on drugs, please ask the Lord to free him and bring him to faith in Christ.
I will close for now. Hope you are all well.
Blessings!
What a journey I've been on since I last wrote anything.
As some of you know, I suffered a stroke, actually bilateral strokes, on July 10. The day I came home from the hospital from the first time I had been there. I was admitted on July 5 for the pain. On July 7 I had a scope put into my stomach to see what was going on there...turned out I had non-erosive gastritis; then the spinal nerve block on July 8 to help with the foot pain (and it did, praise the Lord!).
I was released July 10, had been home about 3 hours, and while my husband went to the market I called my Mom. And just like that, I couldn't talk....it happened so quickly. She knew what was happening, and called our son Shawn who lives just 4 houses from us. He called 911 and then went to get his Dad. His wife stayed here with me.
The next thing I knew the fire rescue squad was here and they took me to a local hospital. I was transferred last that night to Henry Ford Hospital downtown. I can remember some things, others not so much.
An MRI was done late Sunday nite and it showed bilateral strokes, with things going every-which way in my brain. I couldn't talk and my right side was affected...I didn't know the severity of it and I'm glad I didn't.
There is so much I could write and perhaps I will, later on. I am blessed to tell you that I have regained my speech, albeit slowly at times. But that' s okay...slow is good. My speech therapist said that we have a tendency to talk too fast anyway. After leaving the main hospital, I was transferred to Wyandotte Rehab and spent a full week there. Most of my body has returned...some parts are numb and weak, but I can live with that also. "When we are weak, then He is strong" ... I've truly learned what that means.
As I said, there is much I could write, but mostly I want to share prayer requests with you:
#1. My neighbor, MaryAnn, is battling 3 types of cancer
#2. Tony & his wife Margaret & their daughters ... a rough family situation
#3. My nephew Jason...is still on drugs, please ask the Lord to free him and bring him to faith in Christ.
I will close for now. Hope you are all well.
Blessings!
Thursday, July 1, 2010
Thursday
It's been a difficult day ... severe headache pain and I've not taken Lyrica since yest. morning .. wondering if that was the cause after all ... I just don't know anymore ... am so very tired again ... didn't sleep well last nite ... will call neurologist tomorrow & see if I can get in to see her next week ... having difficulty eating again ... not much of an appetite, nothing sounds good today.
Will it be this way forever? That's what it feels like right now. I'm just weary.
Thank you for praying for me.
Will it be this way forever? That's what it feels like right now. I'm just weary.
Thank you for praying for me.
Wednesday, June 30, 2010
Wednesday
Not doing too well today ... much pain from headache. I talked with neurologist earlier and she said Lyrica can cause headaches and told me to stop taking it.
Foot pain is worse also this week. Just when you begin to think things are easing up, something else comes along. Why? I don't know. Probably never will know this side of heaven.
Hope you are all well. My love to you all. I'm going to lie down for awhile.
Foot pain is worse also this week. Just when you begin to think things are easing up, something else comes along. Why? I don't know. Probably never will know this side of heaven.
Hope you are all well. My love to you all. I'm going to lie down for awhile.
Tuesday, June 29, 2010
Tuesday afternoon
Hi all,
Just to let you know I'm still around. Had a good week-end then yesterday and today I'm dealing with a bit more pain.
Anyone out there know if Lyrica causes headaches? How about Vicodin? Does that cause them? Not sure what's going on, just that I'm having headaches daily and I'm not a headache person. I have a call in to the neurologist and will talk with her about it when she calls. The headaches didn't start until after I began Lyrica.
Hope this finds you all well and enjoying the weather. I'm going to go lie down for a while.
Thank you again for praying for me.
Just to let you know I'm still around. Had a good week-end then yesterday and today I'm dealing with a bit more pain.
Anyone out there know if Lyrica causes headaches? How about Vicodin? Does that cause them? Not sure what's going on, just that I'm having headaches daily and I'm not a headache person. I have a call in to the neurologist and will talk with her about it when she calls. The headaches didn't start until after I began Lyrica.
Hope this finds you all well and enjoying the weather. I'm going to go lie down for a while.
Thank you again for praying for me.
Friday, June 25, 2010
Friday
Another day with less pain ... how grateful I am. My Fred left this morning for Ohio. He will spend 3 days visiting with his brother and I'm grateful that I'm well enough that he could go. He so needs this time away.
I've enjoyed this day ... I sat on our front porch for awhile this evening, doing some reading and just resting in the beauty of the day. When you're in pain, it distorts everything and it was difficult to see beauty in anything, or so it seemed. I did some laundry and went to my son's home later to celebrate his youngest daughter's birthday. Our 'baby' granddaughter is 9 yrs old today. Where has time gone?
I read earlier that Joni Eareckson Tada has breast cancer and will have surgery this Monday, June 28. To read more about this, go to her web site: www.joniandfriends.org. She is an amazing woman and her health issues make mine pale in comparison. She gives hope and inspiration to everyone. May this cancer be contained and her recovery swift.
I am finding myself asking God how does He want me to pray. Does that sound childish? Shouldn't I, after all these years, know how to pray? You might think so, but going through this episode has changed my outlook on many things. Prayer being one of them. A once-for-all prayer just doesn't get it. I need to bring specific people / needs / situations before Him and then wait until He allows me to see what is the best way to pray, and then ... pray! It's no longer a "God please bless ...." It's God, what is it You're wishing to do in the life of this person? How do I help in prayer? Show me Lord. I want my prayers to mean something for eternity and that will take some work.
I shall go for now and get ready for bed. Thank you so much for being with me through this experience. Thank you so much for praying for me and sharing words of encouragement. They mean much to me.
Blessings to you all. I love you.
I've enjoyed this day ... I sat on our front porch for awhile this evening, doing some reading and just resting in the beauty of the day. When you're in pain, it distorts everything and it was difficult to see beauty in anything, or so it seemed. I did some laundry and went to my son's home later to celebrate his youngest daughter's birthday. Our 'baby' granddaughter is 9 yrs old today. Where has time gone?
I read earlier that Joni Eareckson Tada has breast cancer and will have surgery this Monday, June 28. To read more about this, go to her web site: www.joniandfriends.org. She is an amazing woman and her health issues make mine pale in comparison. She gives hope and inspiration to everyone. May this cancer be contained and her recovery swift.
I am finding myself asking God how does He want me to pray. Does that sound childish? Shouldn't I, after all these years, know how to pray? You might think so, but going through this episode has changed my outlook on many things. Prayer being one of them. A once-for-all prayer just doesn't get it. I need to bring specific people / needs / situations before Him and then wait until He allows me to see what is the best way to pray, and then ... pray! It's no longer a "God please bless ...." It's God, what is it You're wishing to do in the life of this person? How do I help in prayer? Show me Lord. I want my prayers to mean something for eternity and that will take some work.
I shall go for now and get ready for bed. Thank you so much for being with me through this experience. Thank you so much for praying for me and sharing words of encouragement. They mean much to me.
Blessings to you all. I love you.
Thursday, June 24, 2010
Thursday
Another day with less pain ... thank You Father! I saw lung dr and after testing learned my oxygen levels are down (I kinda knew that), plus I have a lung infection and will begin a 10-day course of antibiotics tomorrow. It was too late in the day to start it today. With other med's I'm taking I have to balance all of them out and an antibiotic will work best at lunch time.
My poor husband just shook his head when I came out of the doctor's office and told him what was going on. Since Christmas Day it's been one thing after another with me. I admire his patience and I am grateful he loves me. He leaves tomorrow for a 3-day visit with his brother in Ohio. He needs this time away and I'm grateful I feel well enough for him to go. Our son & his family live just down the street from us so should I need anything they are close. I want him to get away and hopefully not overly think about me or his Mom while he's gone.
Would you please pray for man named Greg? He's late 40's in age and it was learned today that he has renal cell carcinoma cells in his lungs. He had kidney cancer last year and it was thought treatment had cleared it out, but sadly it didn't. There is nothing they can do as chemotherapy nor radiation can help this type of cancer. He is a Christian but he and his family are taking this very hard. His parents attend our church and I cannot imagine what they are going through. The same for his wife and children.
Thank you dear ones, for being with me thru my health issues. I deeply appreciate it. I am going to bed now.
May our Lord bless each of you and may all your needs be met in Him.
I love you all.
My poor husband just shook his head when I came out of the doctor's office and told him what was going on. Since Christmas Day it's been one thing after another with me. I admire his patience and I am grateful he loves me. He leaves tomorrow for a 3-day visit with his brother in Ohio. He needs this time away and I'm grateful I feel well enough for him to go. Our son & his family live just down the street from us so should I need anything they are close. I want him to get away and hopefully not overly think about me or his Mom while he's gone.
Would you please pray for man named Greg? He's late 40's in age and it was learned today that he has renal cell carcinoma cells in his lungs. He had kidney cancer last year and it was thought treatment had cleared it out, but sadly it didn't. There is nothing they can do as chemotherapy nor radiation can help this type of cancer. He is a Christian but he and his family are taking this very hard. His parents attend our church and I cannot imagine what they are going through. The same for his wife and children.
Thank you dear ones, for being with me thru my health issues. I deeply appreciate it. I am going to bed now.
May our Lord bless each of you and may all your needs be met in Him.
I love you all.
Wednesday, June 23, 2010
Wednesday
Praise be to our God, maker of heaven and earth! He alone is worthy of our praise!
I am so thankful to let you know that this has been a day of lessened pain. The combination of Lyrica & lowered doses of pain medication seem to be working in my favor. Praise be to God!!! The pain isn't completely gone, but it's better ... I was able to once again go downstairs & do a load of laundry ... giving thanks all the while ... I once again helped clean the kitchen after dinner ... thanking God for a husband who cooks and for the ability and the energy and the desire to WANT to help. I was actually hungry and my Fred noticed and commented on it.
Pat has shared with me about her husband's dealing with neuropathy and let me know that he too takes Lyrica. That was a blessing to know as I am overly cautious about new medications.
What I am asking God is to not let me forget what I'm learning through this time of pain.
What am I learning? That He is trustworthy beyond our ability to understand. That He is patient beyond comprehension. That He desires only our good and sometimes that involves walking through dark, hard, fiery places. That He truly IS the Potter and I am the clay ... He can do with me as He pleases and I dare not whisper a complaint. That His children are His forever ... nothing will take us from His hand. That His people are a blessing and we are here to serve and encourage and strengthen one another ... never tear down or hurt or cause harm of any sort. That I am loved.
This walk of ours isn't an easy one, but it is one that's worth the walk. When we all reach Home we will have so many stories to share won't we? Once Home, I will meet some of you for the first time (other than blogs & facebook that is). I will renew friendships with saints who have already reached Home. (Jean Vallis comes to mind...so does Mary Allen & Virginia Mobley). I will see my Dad and my sister Janice. Oh we have so much to look forward to!
I shall go for now & get ready for bed. I'm still resting a lot and going to bed early.
Thank you dear ones ... thank you for praying for me ... for thinking of me .. for remembering me during your days. I love you all!
I am so thankful to let you know that this has been a day of lessened pain. The combination of Lyrica & lowered doses of pain medication seem to be working in my favor. Praise be to God!!! The pain isn't completely gone, but it's better ... I was able to once again go downstairs & do a load of laundry ... giving thanks all the while ... I once again helped clean the kitchen after dinner ... thanking God for a husband who cooks and for the ability and the energy and the desire to WANT to help. I was actually hungry and my Fred noticed and commented on it.
Pat has shared with me about her husband's dealing with neuropathy and let me know that he too takes Lyrica. That was a blessing to know as I am overly cautious about new medications.
What I am asking God is to not let me forget what I'm learning through this time of pain.
What am I learning? That He is trustworthy beyond our ability to understand. That He is patient beyond comprehension. That He desires only our good and sometimes that involves walking through dark, hard, fiery places. That He truly IS the Potter and I am the clay ... He can do with me as He pleases and I dare not whisper a complaint. That His children are His forever ... nothing will take us from His hand. That His people are a blessing and we are here to serve and encourage and strengthen one another ... never tear down or hurt or cause harm of any sort. That I am loved.
This walk of ours isn't an easy one, but it is one that's worth the walk. When we all reach Home we will have so many stories to share won't we? Once Home, I will meet some of you for the first time (other than blogs & facebook that is). I will renew friendships with saints who have already reached Home. (Jean Vallis comes to mind...so does Mary Allen & Virginia Mobley). I will see my Dad and my sister Janice. Oh we have so much to look forward to!
I shall go for now & get ready for bed. I'm still resting a lot and going to bed early.
Thank you dear ones ... thank you for praying for me ... for thinking of me .. for remembering me during your days. I love you all!
Monday, June 21, 2010
Monday
Another day this side of heaven.
Clyde took me for bloodwork this morning, the doctor ordered an oncology profile along with my usual CBC. That made me stop and give some serious thought to what's happening in this body of mine. Please, for those of you who know my Mom, please don't say anything. She has enough to deal with. Should something come from this additional bloodwork, then I'll talk with her.
I realize, we all do, that this life will end one day but with all I'm dealing with it makes me wonder if my time is closer than I might think. It could be, only God knows. While I wouldn't want to leave those I love, I am beginning to want my desire to be in God's will greater than staying here. Does that make sense?
Yesterday was a good day ... I was able to rest and dealt with pain on a good basis if that makes sense. Today is different ... more pain but dealing with it is easier. My appetite is improving ... thank You Lord and thank you all for praying for these answers to prayer. For some relief. For words of encouragement from folks who care and from those who deal with neuropathy also.
I'm learning to let go ... to open my clinched little hands and let go ... of all that can hinder and harm my walk with Christ. My fears, insecurities, doubts, hurts, and even the pain .... let it go and let the Lord truly be Lord of my life. I've said that He is ... believed that He is, but this episode of daily pain has shown me that to a large extent it's been words, not relationship. I've tried to be the good Christian and haven't wanted anyone to see the real me...the one God sees and loves in spite of me. I wanted to look good ... to have people think well of me and those aren't inherently wrong. Our reason for wanting them can be.
I'm learning that I want people to see Christ in me and that perhaps this pain is part of the peeling-off process to get there. It hurts like heck, and it burns like fire, but if this will make me more like our Lord, so be it. I've finally come to that place ... so be it.
Earlier today I was remembering when I was in the coma in 1979. God graciously brought me from darkness to light way back then. Gave me back my life when doctors said it was over, and then gave me new life in Christ. Today I saw that He has taken me from light into the darkness of pain so that He can continue the work He began in me. So be it Lord. So be it. Amen and amen. Your will be done.
I thank you all ... from the bottom of this sin-soaked heart, I thank you for caring for me ... for praying ... for your words of encouragement and hope. You cannot know what they have meant and what they mean to me when I read them.
May our Lord richly bless you and may all your needs be met in Him. I shall, Lord willing, write more later.
My love to you all.
Clyde took me for bloodwork this morning, the doctor ordered an oncology profile along with my usual CBC. That made me stop and give some serious thought to what's happening in this body of mine. Please, for those of you who know my Mom, please don't say anything. She has enough to deal with. Should something come from this additional bloodwork, then I'll talk with her.
I realize, we all do, that this life will end one day but with all I'm dealing with it makes me wonder if my time is closer than I might think. It could be, only God knows. While I wouldn't want to leave those I love, I am beginning to want my desire to be in God's will greater than staying here. Does that make sense?
Yesterday was a good day ... I was able to rest and dealt with pain on a good basis if that makes sense. Today is different ... more pain but dealing with it is easier. My appetite is improving ... thank You Lord and thank you all for praying for these answers to prayer. For some relief. For words of encouragement from folks who care and from those who deal with neuropathy also.
I'm learning to let go ... to open my clinched little hands and let go ... of all that can hinder and harm my walk with Christ. My fears, insecurities, doubts, hurts, and even the pain .... let it go and let the Lord truly be Lord of my life. I've said that He is ... believed that He is, but this episode of daily pain has shown me that to a large extent it's been words, not relationship. I've tried to be the good Christian and haven't wanted anyone to see the real me...the one God sees and loves in spite of me. I wanted to look good ... to have people think well of me and those aren't inherently wrong. Our reason for wanting them can be.
I'm learning that I want people to see Christ in me and that perhaps this pain is part of the peeling-off process to get there. It hurts like heck, and it burns like fire, but if this will make me more like our Lord, so be it. I've finally come to that place ... so be it.
Earlier today I was remembering when I was in the coma in 1979. God graciously brought me from darkness to light way back then. Gave me back my life when doctors said it was over, and then gave me new life in Christ. Today I saw that He has taken me from light into the darkness of pain so that He can continue the work He began in me. So be it Lord. So be it. Amen and amen. Your will be done.
I thank you all ... from the bottom of this sin-soaked heart, I thank you for caring for me ... for praying ... for your words of encouragement and hope. You cannot know what they have meant and what they mean to me when I read them.
May our Lord richly bless you and may all your needs be met in Him. I shall, Lord willing, write more later.
My love to you all.
Saturday, June 19, 2010
Saturday night
J. C. Ryle:
“There is nothing which shows our ignorance so much as our impatience under trouble. We forget that every cross is a message from God, and intended to do us good in the end. Trials are intended to make us think—to wean us from the world—to send us to the Bible—to drive us to our knees.” “Man does not live on bread alone but on every word that comes from the mouth of the LORD” (Deuteronomy 8:3).
Oh, how I needed to read this~ may it bless you as well.
Feeling a tad bit better this evening, praise the name of our good Lord!
“There is nothing which shows our ignorance so much as our impatience under trouble. We forget that every cross is a message from God, and intended to do us good in the end. Trials are intended to make us think—to wean us from the world—to send us to the Bible—to drive us to our knees.” “Man does not live on bread alone but on every word that comes from the mouth of the LORD” (Deuteronomy 8:3).
Oh, how I needed to read this~ may it bless you as well.
Feeling a tad bit better this evening, praise the name of our good Lord!
Saturday
Yesterday was a really bad day pain-wise. I keep asking myself, how do people live with this? When does relief come? What if it doesn't come?
My thoughts are scattered and I do my best to keep them in check, but when you're medicated and in pain, that's difficult to do. Lord help me, please!
My Fred bought me Ensure yesterday so I can supplement my meals with that. I know I have to eat in order to be well, but my appetite is pitifully low.
I began taking Lyrica yesterday afternoon, will take it twice daily now to see if it helps this nerve pain. Has anyone out there taken it? Do you know of anyone who did? Did it help?
Never, ever, have I been in a place like this. I would rather go Home than have to live like this. Not that I would hurt myself, but I find that Heaven looks better and better compared with what we deal with here. Perhaps that's been part of my problem ... too comfortable here ... not looking for His return ... not desiring Him more than life itself. God forgive me.
Thank you for praying for me .... I love you all.
My thoughts are scattered and I do my best to keep them in check, but when you're medicated and in pain, that's difficult to do. Lord help me, please!
My Fred bought me Ensure yesterday so I can supplement my meals with that. I know I have to eat in order to be well, but my appetite is pitifully low.
I began taking Lyrica yesterday afternoon, will take it twice daily now to see if it helps this nerve pain. Has anyone out there taken it? Do you know of anyone who did? Did it help?
Never, ever, have I been in a place like this. I would rather go Home than have to live like this. Not that I would hurt myself, but I find that Heaven looks better and better compared with what we deal with here. Perhaps that's been part of my problem ... too comfortable here ... not looking for His return ... not desiring Him more than life itself. God forgive me.
Thank you for praying for me .... I love you all.
Friday, June 18, 2010
Friday ....
Pain! So much pain! Lord I cry out to You ... please Father, relieve this pain. Forgive me my sins and cleanse me from all unrighteousness. Help me Lord to lean only on You. Clear my thinking. Allow the stomach pain to ease also. Give me an appetite and help me keep food down.
All I know to do is cry out to You Lord.
Thank You for those who are praying for me.
All I know to do is cry out to You Lord.
Thank You for those who are praying for me.
Thursday, June 17, 2010
Thursday
Another day, praise the Lord for another day. His will be done.
I met with two neurologists yesterday. They seem to be very thorough and are attempting to find the root cause of the neuropathy. They asked if I did yard work and had I been exposed to pesticides. They ordered blood work that will check for toxins along with levels of mercury, copper, lead and arsenic. They are also looking for Lupus and Sclera-derma. These are things I never thought of but they can all cause nerve damage.
The appt. for the spinal nerve block has been set up for July 8 and hopefully that will give relief. A new medication was ordered (Lyrica) but my insurance must grant prior approval before saying yes to covering it. My doctor's nurse is working on that now. She has called me twice this morning for information.
Jacqueline, thank you for checking on me and please, pray for the home-bound and call them when you can. It means more than you can know unless you've been one who can't get out much. Trish, Pat, Amrita and all you other ladies, thank you! When the pain gets the worst I know someone is praying and that it will pass. It comes in waves and thankfully, if I lay on my back with my legs propped up, I can rest and the pain eases.
I find myself taking the time to quietly pray for those whom I know are hurting ... Hal, Bonnie, Gladys, Edie and others. I also find myself having been slowed to a near stop and resigning myself to the fact my times are truly in God's hands and He indeed orders my steps and directs my path, but I have been one to bolt ahead and rush to do what I thought was most important. Slowing down has shown me how off my sense of direction was. He is mericful and I am thankful.
I must go but before I do, I ask you to please pray for a little girl named Madeline. She is 7 yrs old and has brain cancer and is being taken to St. Jude's Hospital for treatment. My sister Linda told me about her this morning.
Thank you all again. You are deeply appreciated and I love you all.
Blessings.
"This is only for a season"
I met with two neurologists yesterday. They seem to be very thorough and are attempting to find the root cause of the neuropathy. They asked if I did yard work and had I been exposed to pesticides. They ordered blood work that will check for toxins along with levels of mercury, copper, lead and arsenic. They are also looking for Lupus and Sclera-derma. These are things I never thought of but they can all cause nerve damage.
The appt. for the spinal nerve block has been set up for July 8 and hopefully that will give relief. A new medication was ordered (Lyrica) but my insurance must grant prior approval before saying yes to covering it. My doctor's nurse is working on that now. She has called me twice this morning for information.
Jacqueline, thank you for checking on me and please, pray for the home-bound and call them when you can. It means more than you can know unless you've been one who can't get out much. Trish, Pat, Amrita and all you other ladies, thank you! When the pain gets the worst I know someone is praying and that it will pass. It comes in waves and thankfully, if I lay on my back with my legs propped up, I can rest and the pain eases.
I find myself taking the time to quietly pray for those whom I know are hurting ... Hal, Bonnie, Gladys, Edie and others. I also find myself having been slowed to a near stop and resigning myself to the fact my times are truly in God's hands and He indeed orders my steps and directs my path, but I have been one to bolt ahead and rush to do what I thought was most important. Slowing down has shown me how off my sense of direction was. He is mericful and I am thankful.
I must go but before I do, I ask you to please pray for a little girl named Madeline. She is 7 yrs old and has brain cancer and is being taken to St. Jude's Hospital for treatment. My sister Linda told me about her this morning.
Thank you all again. You are deeply appreciated and I love you all.
Blessings.
"This is only for a season"
Tuesday, June 15, 2010
Tuesday morning...
Thanks be to the good Lord I was able to sleep last night. It amazes me how much we need sleep and rest. I better understand how and why God rested (even though He surely didn't need to) on the seventh day. And why he gave us that day, if we will take it, to do the same.
I also better understand why he created darkness, and designed our bodies to need to sleep during that time. We cannot do much of anything in a proper manner, without sleep and rest. Why do we think we can?
Later this morning, Lord willing, my husband will take me to Target. A small outing to test the waters I suppose, but one I feel I would like to make. That store is easier to navigate than the larger stores so that's where I'll be testing my strength this morning. Pain? Still here, but I will do as Thara and my other friend have wisely advised and take pain medication before the pain overtakes me. Because I was able to sleep, my mental faculities seem more stable today and that is a big blessing.
I talked with my hematologist earlier this morning ... I will not need the phlebotomy this week after all. Thank the Lord. I will have blood taken next Monday and we'll go from there. Before he ended the call he said "Remember to keep the prayers going and hold your head up, this won't last forever". Bless him.
My love to you all. Thank you for reading and especially thank you for praying for this weary pilgrim.
I also better understand why he created darkness, and designed our bodies to need to sleep during that time. We cannot do much of anything in a proper manner, without sleep and rest. Why do we think we can?
Later this morning, Lord willing, my husband will take me to Target. A small outing to test the waters I suppose, but one I feel I would like to make. That store is easier to navigate than the larger stores so that's where I'll be testing my strength this morning. Pain? Still here, but I will do as Thara and my other friend have wisely advised and take pain medication before the pain overtakes me. Because I was able to sleep, my mental faculities seem more stable today and that is a big blessing.
I talked with my hematologist earlier this morning ... I will not need the phlebotomy this week after all. Thank the Lord. I will have blood taken next Monday and we'll go from there. Before he ended the call he said "Remember to keep the prayers going and hold your head up, this won't last forever". Bless him.
My love to you all. Thank you for reading and especially thank you for praying for this weary pilgrim.
Monday, June 14, 2010
Monday
After not sleeping well last nite, and getting up earlier than I usually do, we made it to the dr's appts. downtown today.
My hematologist, a Godly Christian man, entered the exam room and saw how weary I looked, then leaned close to me and said "this is only for a season, it won't last forever, remember that, okay?" I cried and was so thankful for his sensitivity and caring and before long, there was a smile where tears had been. Did he promise me health on a silver platter? No. He just reinforced the fact that this won't last forever and that as Christians, we have so much waiting for us that one day, all this will simply fade into distant memory.
He decided to post-pone the phlebotomy when he saw how stressed and tired I was. He also ordered additional blood work and I will get the results tomorrow morning. If needed, I will have the phlebotomy done at a local cancer center rather than have to go back downtown to have it done.
He also determined that I need to stay off the platelet medication until we find out what's going on with my liver. It's enlarged and at times, causes pain. I will see a specialist in that field on July 6. He is hoping the platelet medication hasn't caused liver damage, which is a possibility with that drug.
I saw the neurosurgeon next and she confirmed that I do not need surgery. Good news. She showed me the MRI pictures and explained what can happen as we get older ... the disks in the lower back squeeze together and nerve endings end up in places they shouldn't be. She believes that is partly the cause of the foot pain and neuropathy. She prescribed a Medrol dose pak , believing that medication will enable the inflammation to go down and hopefully help the pain subside. I will be seeing a neurologist on a regular basis, she feels I need that, and my first appt. with that Dr. is this Wed. morning downtown. She also arranged for someone from their pain clinic to call & set up an appt. She said there are numerous ways to deal with pain, and hopefully they will have an answer as to what will work best for me. She mentioned the injection they put into your spine as one of the treatments. My mother-in-law has had this done and it helped her tremendously.
Something my hematologist said has stayed with me today..."we are not made for this world and much of our disappointment comes when things just don't seem to go as we think they should ... we need to understand that as Christians, our Home is yet to come and it is only there that we will find real answers to real problems. Suffering being among the big ones we face."
Again I thank you for praying for me. I pray for Hal each night and for others who I know are dealing with chronic health issues and the depression that comes along with them. I told my dr today that I have been in such a dark place and I feel as though I have been twisted into a shape I didn't recognize as me ... and he said "pain will do that, I understand".
That's what I need to offer to others ... the fact I know what pain can do ... turn you inside out and make you wonder about your own sanity ... make you question most everything you ever thought to be true ... and just when you think you can't handle another minute of it, relief comes ... however slight it may be, it comes and you can take a deep breath and relax just a bit before it hits again. Thank the Lord my dr was right when he said "this is only for a season ... it won't last forever ..."
My love to you all, always.
My hematologist, a Godly Christian man, entered the exam room and saw how weary I looked, then leaned close to me and said "this is only for a season, it won't last forever, remember that, okay?" I cried and was so thankful for his sensitivity and caring and before long, there was a smile where tears had been. Did he promise me health on a silver platter? No. He just reinforced the fact that this won't last forever and that as Christians, we have so much waiting for us that one day, all this will simply fade into distant memory.
He decided to post-pone the phlebotomy when he saw how stressed and tired I was. He also ordered additional blood work and I will get the results tomorrow morning. If needed, I will have the phlebotomy done at a local cancer center rather than have to go back downtown to have it done.
He also determined that I need to stay off the platelet medication until we find out what's going on with my liver. It's enlarged and at times, causes pain. I will see a specialist in that field on July 6. He is hoping the platelet medication hasn't caused liver damage, which is a possibility with that drug.
I saw the neurosurgeon next and she confirmed that I do not need surgery. Good news. She showed me the MRI pictures and explained what can happen as we get older ... the disks in the lower back squeeze together and nerve endings end up in places they shouldn't be. She believes that is partly the cause of the foot pain and neuropathy. She prescribed a Medrol dose pak , believing that medication will enable the inflammation to go down and hopefully help the pain subside. I will be seeing a neurologist on a regular basis, she feels I need that, and my first appt. with that Dr. is this Wed. morning downtown. She also arranged for someone from their pain clinic to call & set up an appt. She said there are numerous ways to deal with pain, and hopefully they will have an answer as to what will work best for me. She mentioned the injection they put into your spine as one of the treatments. My mother-in-law has had this done and it helped her tremendously.
Something my hematologist said has stayed with me today..."we are not made for this world and much of our disappointment comes when things just don't seem to go as we think they should ... we need to understand that as Christians, our Home is yet to come and it is only there that we will find real answers to real problems. Suffering being among the big ones we face."
Again I thank you for praying for me. I pray for Hal each night and for others who I know are dealing with chronic health issues and the depression that comes along with them. I told my dr today that I have been in such a dark place and I feel as though I have been twisted into a shape I didn't recognize as me ... and he said "pain will do that, I understand".
That's what I need to offer to others ... the fact I know what pain can do ... turn you inside out and make you wonder about your own sanity ... make you question most everything you ever thought to be true ... and just when you think you can't handle another minute of it, relief comes ... however slight it may be, it comes and you can take a deep breath and relax just a bit before it hits again. Thank the Lord my dr was right when he said "this is only for a season ... it won't last forever ..."
My love to you all, always.
Sunday, June 13, 2010
Thank You...
Thank You Father for this new day.
Thank You that Your mercies are new every morning.
Thank You for friends who pray for me.
Thank You for grace ... undescribable, marvelous grace.
Thank You for this shell that houses the spirit You made alive in Christ.
Thank You that You are at work in me and that pain is part of the process, even though I don't like it.
Thank You for Jesus' blood that covers my sins.
Thank You that nothing can take me from Your hand.
Thank You for the fan that softly whirls in the background right now.
Thank You for this computer and internet that I use to communicate with friends.
Thank You for sunshine.
Thank You for Your precious Holy Spirit. My teacher, comforter and guide.
Thank You for medication to help my health issues.
Thank You for doctors who care.
Thank You for insurance.
Thank You for my Fred who loves me in spite of me.
Thank You for my grandgirls, even the one who doesn't talk to us.
Thank You for our 'daughters' ... Jane & Wendy.
Thank You for Shawn & David.
Thank You for our church.
Thank You for those few close friends who never leave regardless of how testy we can be.
Thank You ... O my God ... Thank you that one day I will slip from this 'house' and go Home!
Thank You my Lord for You, the greatest gift I have ever been given.
Thank You that You see us through the hard places and in Your time, give us hope.
Thank You that we can rest on what Your Word says is truth, not what our emotions tell us.
Thank You that You are our Rock.
Thank You that You are our Defender.
Thank You that You ever live to make intercession for us.
Thank You that You are our Advocate.
Thank You that You give us what we need and not what we deserve.
Thank You!!
Thank You!!
Thank You!!
Thank You that Your mercies are new every morning.
Thank You for friends who pray for me.
Thank You for grace ... undescribable, marvelous grace.
Thank You for this shell that houses the spirit You made alive in Christ.
Thank You that You are at work in me and that pain is part of the process, even though I don't like it.
Thank You for Jesus' blood that covers my sins.
Thank You that nothing can take me from Your hand.
Thank You for the fan that softly whirls in the background right now.
Thank You for this computer and internet that I use to communicate with friends.
Thank You for sunshine.
Thank You for Your precious Holy Spirit. My teacher, comforter and guide.
Thank You for medication to help my health issues.
Thank You for doctors who care.
Thank You for insurance.
Thank You for my Fred who loves me in spite of me.
Thank You for my grandgirls, even the one who doesn't talk to us.
Thank You for our 'daughters' ... Jane & Wendy.
Thank You for Shawn & David.
Thank You for our church.
Thank You for those few close friends who never leave regardless of how testy we can be.
Thank You ... O my God ... Thank you that one day I will slip from this 'house' and go Home!
Thank You my Lord for You, the greatest gift I have ever been given.
Thank You that You see us through the hard places and in Your time, give us hope.
Thank You that we can rest on what Your Word says is truth, not what our emotions tell us.
Thank You that You are our Rock.
Thank You that You are our Defender.
Thank You that You ever live to make intercession for us.
Thank You that You are our Advocate.
Thank You that You give us what we need and not what we deserve.
Thank You!!
Thank You!!
Thank You!!
Saturday, June 12, 2010
One more day...
Just one more day til I hopefully find out what's causing the pain. I received the MRI results in today's mail, and learned I have some protuding disks along my spine, but I don't understand what else was written. I will take that report with me to the neurosurgeon and have her interpret it for me. Any other time and I would have been googling those words on the internet, but today I just didn't care to find out. Too much effort.
I tried to do without pain medication longer than usual this morning, but that didn't last long. This burning, searing pain becomes unbearable and I remember what my friend said about stressing your body even more when we don't medicate on schedule. So I took the pill, laid back down and rested.
One good thing to report ... I actually chose what I wanted for dinner ... my Fred picked it up from the restaurant and I ate it! No pushing food around, no grimacing because I had to eat. Thank the Lord for that victory! One step forward is a major blessing at this stage.
A dear friend called tonight ... she and I went to church together for awhile ... have been friends for 39 years ... she is going thru a difficult time also. Physical challenges and grown children who are taxing her soul ... a husband who isn't a Christian and not supportive ... puts my problems into a new perspective. We can always learn of someone who's going thru just a bit more than we are and today, we don't have to look far to find them. Or so it seems.
Our granddaughter Erica came to the house this afternoon so her Papa could put air in a pool toy. She ran in and gave me a hug and a kiss and asked how I was doing. She saw my arm and the large bruise from the blown vein and asked me what had happened. I told her and she said "Oh, does it hurt?" And I said yes it does, a bit. When you're 8, almost 9, bruising and painful feet must seem as foreign to you as Mars. But I'm very thankful she and her sister Stephanie care enough about me to call or come & visit.
Will go and get ready for bed. Prayerfully rest will come and I can sleep. Not going to church tomorrow. Will stay in and continue resting as much as I can. Monday will be a busy day but I'm looking forward to getting answers.
May your evening be rest-filled and may your Sunday be blessed. Thank you all again for praying for me.
I tried to do without pain medication longer than usual this morning, but that didn't last long. This burning, searing pain becomes unbearable and I remember what my friend said about stressing your body even more when we don't medicate on schedule. So I took the pill, laid back down and rested.
One good thing to report ... I actually chose what I wanted for dinner ... my Fred picked it up from the restaurant and I ate it! No pushing food around, no grimacing because I had to eat. Thank the Lord for that victory! One step forward is a major blessing at this stage.
A dear friend called tonight ... she and I went to church together for awhile ... have been friends for 39 years ... she is going thru a difficult time also. Physical challenges and grown children who are taxing her soul ... a husband who isn't a Christian and not supportive ... puts my problems into a new perspective. We can always learn of someone who's going thru just a bit more than we are and today, we don't have to look far to find them. Or so it seems.
Our granddaughter Erica came to the house this afternoon so her Papa could put air in a pool toy. She ran in and gave me a hug and a kiss and asked how I was doing. She saw my arm and the large bruise from the blown vein and asked me what had happened. I told her and she said "Oh, does it hurt?" And I said yes it does, a bit. When you're 8, almost 9, bruising and painful feet must seem as foreign to you as Mars. But I'm very thankful she and her sister Stephanie care enough about me to call or come & visit.
Will go and get ready for bed. Prayerfully rest will come and I can sleep. Not going to church tomorrow. Will stay in and continue resting as much as I can. Monday will be a busy day but I'm looking forward to getting answers.
May your evening be rest-filled and may your Sunday be blessed. Thank you all again for praying for me.
Friday, June 11, 2010
Counting ...
I'm counting the days until I see the specialists on Monday. And praying / hoping they will have God-given answers to the pain & other health issues I'm dealing with.
Sleep was scarce last night ... too much pain for true sleep to come, even with medication. All I know to do in these times is cry out to the Lord and then pray for those I know are dealing with health issues of their own.
I find myself wondering "what if there is no medical answer?" and then shake that thought from my mind. There IS an answer, there is always an answer if you are a child of God! Ultimately, He holds all the answers anyway. He simply uses human beings as conduits from time to time. I also find myself saying that I simply want to be able to walk without pain again ... not do sprints or run marathons, just walk without pain. Such a simple thing for most people, but for those with chronic pain the simple often becomes the seemingly impossible.
The comments from friends, new and old, are a blessing. Thank you so much for reading and for praying and for taking the time to write your thoughts. They are a sort of life-line right now. You reach out to me and then talk to our Father on my behalf. Thank you. Some of you I may never meet this side of heaven, but I deeply appreciate you and look forward to the day we will meet in our new Home, and worship our Lord together, for all eternity.
Oh friends, I'm learning that I have been selfish in ways I didn't see until this happened. At times I felt as though I had too much to do to take the time to talk gently with someone on the phone. Phone calls can be divine interruptions if we'll only take the time to see that. My sense of 'self-importance' slowly seeped into the sewer as my seams unraveled these past few days. God has allowed me to see that my 'self' is nothing to brag about and there's nothing more important than time with Him and His people. May I remember these lessons in the days ahead. May I live what I'm learning and truly be a do-er of God's Word and not just a hearer. May I put into practice what He wants me to do ... live and love and be content with what He has supplied; ever looking to heaven for His soon return. Is this the day? Tomorrow? Soon.
I must go for now & get me to bed. Hopefully this night will bring sleep. I am tired.
Thank you again. May the Lord bless you and meet each need you may have.
Sleep was scarce last night ... too much pain for true sleep to come, even with medication. All I know to do in these times is cry out to the Lord and then pray for those I know are dealing with health issues of their own.
I find myself wondering "what if there is no medical answer?" and then shake that thought from my mind. There IS an answer, there is always an answer if you are a child of God! Ultimately, He holds all the answers anyway. He simply uses human beings as conduits from time to time. I also find myself saying that I simply want to be able to walk without pain again ... not do sprints or run marathons, just walk without pain. Such a simple thing for most people, but for those with chronic pain the simple often becomes the seemingly impossible.
The comments from friends, new and old, are a blessing. Thank you so much for reading and for praying and for taking the time to write your thoughts. They are a sort of life-line right now. You reach out to me and then talk to our Father on my behalf. Thank you. Some of you I may never meet this side of heaven, but I deeply appreciate you and look forward to the day we will meet in our new Home, and worship our Lord together, for all eternity.
Oh friends, I'm learning that I have been selfish in ways I didn't see until this happened. At times I felt as though I had too much to do to take the time to talk gently with someone on the phone. Phone calls can be divine interruptions if we'll only take the time to see that. My sense of 'self-importance' slowly seeped into the sewer as my seams unraveled these past few days. God has allowed me to see that my 'self' is nothing to brag about and there's nothing more important than time with Him and His people. May I remember these lessons in the days ahead. May I live what I'm learning and truly be a do-er of God's Word and not just a hearer. May I put into practice what He wants me to do ... live and love and be content with what He has supplied; ever looking to heaven for His soon return. Is this the day? Tomorrow? Soon.
I must go for now & get me to bed. Hopefully this night will bring sleep. I am tired.
Thank you again. May the Lord bless you and meet each need you may have.
Thursday, June 10, 2010
Pain...
Pain. Seemingly never-ending pain. Burning, searing pain.
While I've dealt with health issues for most of my 63 yrs on this earth, I have never dealt with pain like this. When I came out of the coma in 1979 I was told I had nerve damage in parts of my body. Okay I thought, I can live with that. Over the years I began to learn what nerve damage can mean. Pain.
Last year I began having too-frequent bouts of pain in my feet and lower legs. It would come and then leave and again I thought, I can live with that.
Earlier this year the pain came back and has persisted for 3 months. I was diagnosed with neuropathy in early April and given a new medication that was supposed to help. It did for about 3 days. The pain worsened, and swelling in my right foot and lower leg came with it.
I left with my Mom on May 18 to make the trip that would end with us planning and then attending her brother's funeral. We were gone for 8 days and I dealt with pain each hour of each day we were gone. I had not told my Mom beforehand what I was experiencing because, as the Mom of 7 children and ump-teen grandkids and great-grandkids, I didn't want to add one more thing to her plate. So I handled it the best I could until we got home. Then I began to come apart at the seams of this fragile thing we call Life.
We got home late Wed., May 26. I was in a doctor's office the morning of Friday, May 28 to have exrays done of my foot as I thought I had possibly broken a bone. I hadn't.
On Tuesday, June 1, I began dealing with vertigo & throwing up. My husband took me to ER where I was given medications and sent home. The seams unraveled even more.
On Wednesday, June 2, I had no appetite and was experiencing severe itching and had bruising similar to what I had in Dec. when I was hospitalized. I did some reading about the neuropathy medication and my platelet medication and began to realize I was undoubtedly having a bad reaction to either one or both of these medications. I stopped taking them the night of June 2 because nothing would stay down.
As of this writing, I still don't have an appetite. I eat because I have to, not because I want to. Nothing sounds good to me. Did you know that losing your apppetite is really difficult to handle? We have to eat to live, but when you have no desire for food, you must make yourself eat and that's difficult. At least it has been for me. And since my husband does the majority of the cooking, it's difficult for him too. What do I want to eat? What do I think I'd like to have for dinner? he asks. Whatever you want to fix is my answer.
After extensive emails to a friend who has worked for dr's, (friends are easier to reach than nurses and doctors) I realized I must take pain medication on a regular basis because not doing so when you're in extreme pain only adds stress to an already painful condition and can make said medication less effective. Okay. So yesterday, rather than biting the bullet and getting thru the day without anything, I took lower doses of the prescribed pain medication. I will continue to do so until this issue is resolved.
What am I learning from this? That I am a fragile human being who is totally dependent on the God who created the universe for my next breath. That I cannot fix some things in myself nor in others. That I need to humbly approach His throne and beg for mercy. That it is His grace alone that sustains me, in the dark places of my soul, it is He who sustains and keeps me. That I am not super-anything. That I will one day lie down and take my last breath and things will be left undone when I do.
You see, I am a person who wants things to be in order and organized. I want to plan my day and give space for "whatever God wills" on that calendar, but I have never wanted His will to involve this kind of pain. Do I trust Him enough to know He's with me in it? Do I trust Him to keep me when words fail me? Am I really His child? These are all questions that have been going through my mind these last two weeks.
Thankfully I can say, yes I am His. I can trust Him, even though He may slay me, I trust Him.
I have three appointments on Monday, June 14:
#1. My hemotologist at 9 am
#2. The neurosurgeon at 11:30 am
#3. A phlebotomy must be done at 2pm
Thankfully they're all at the main hospital downtown. Thankfully my husband can drive me and stay with me. Thankfully we have insurance to pay for all this.
Hopefully, prayerfully, my doctors will have answers and solutions can be worked out so that the pain will go away and prayerfully, stay away. I feel so old. So weary. So ready to lie down and let it all go. Maybe that's where I've needed to be and needed to do and just didn't know it until this happened. I need to lie down and rest and let all the other stuff go. If not forever, then at least for awhile.
I sincerely hope and pray you are all well ... mentally, physically, emotionally and spiritually well. For I am learning that when one area is off-balance it affects all the others and if we persist in plodding along without treating the one issue, our seams will fully unravel and we'll have to deal with much more than we expected.
May our Lord bless and keep you. May your needs be met in Him. Thank you for listening and reading.
While I've dealt with health issues for most of my 63 yrs on this earth, I have never dealt with pain like this. When I came out of the coma in 1979 I was told I had nerve damage in parts of my body. Okay I thought, I can live with that. Over the years I began to learn what nerve damage can mean. Pain.
Last year I began having too-frequent bouts of pain in my feet and lower legs. It would come and then leave and again I thought, I can live with that.
Earlier this year the pain came back and has persisted for 3 months. I was diagnosed with neuropathy in early April and given a new medication that was supposed to help. It did for about 3 days. The pain worsened, and swelling in my right foot and lower leg came with it.
I left with my Mom on May 18 to make the trip that would end with us planning and then attending her brother's funeral. We were gone for 8 days and I dealt with pain each hour of each day we were gone. I had not told my Mom beforehand what I was experiencing because, as the Mom of 7 children and ump-teen grandkids and great-grandkids, I didn't want to add one more thing to her plate. So I handled it the best I could until we got home. Then I began to come apart at the seams of this fragile thing we call Life.
We got home late Wed., May 26. I was in a doctor's office the morning of Friday, May 28 to have exrays done of my foot as I thought I had possibly broken a bone. I hadn't.
On Tuesday, June 1, I began dealing with vertigo & throwing up. My husband took me to ER where I was given medications and sent home. The seams unraveled even more.
On Wednesday, June 2, I had no appetite and was experiencing severe itching and had bruising similar to what I had in Dec. when I was hospitalized. I did some reading about the neuropathy medication and my platelet medication and began to realize I was undoubtedly having a bad reaction to either one or both of these medications. I stopped taking them the night of June 2 because nothing would stay down.
As of this writing, I still don't have an appetite. I eat because I have to, not because I want to. Nothing sounds good to me. Did you know that losing your apppetite is really difficult to handle? We have to eat to live, but when you have no desire for food, you must make yourself eat and that's difficult. At least it has been for me. And since my husband does the majority of the cooking, it's difficult for him too. What do I want to eat? What do I think I'd like to have for dinner? he asks. Whatever you want to fix is my answer.
After extensive emails to a friend who has worked for dr's, (friends are easier to reach than nurses and doctors) I realized I must take pain medication on a regular basis because not doing so when you're in extreme pain only adds stress to an already painful condition and can make said medication less effective. Okay. So yesterday, rather than biting the bullet and getting thru the day without anything, I took lower doses of the prescribed pain medication. I will continue to do so until this issue is resolved.
What am I learning from this? That I am a fragile human being who is totally dependent on the God who created the universe for my next breath. That I cannot fix some things in myself nor in others. That I need to humbly approach His throne and beg for mercy. That it is His grace alone that sustains me, in the dark places of my soul, it is He who sustains and keeps me. That I am not super-anything. That I will one day lie down and take my last breath and things will be left undone when I do.
You see, I am a person who wants things to be in order and organized. I want to plan my day and give space for "whatever God wills" on that calendar, but I have never wanted His will to involve this kind of pain. Do I trust Him enough to know He's with me in it? Do I trust Him to keep me when words fail me? Am I really His child? These are all questions that have been going through my mind these last two weeks.
Thankfully I can say, yes I am His. I can trust Him, even though He may slay me, I trust Him.
I have three appointments on Monday, June 14:
#1. My hemotologist at 9 am
#2. The neurosurgeon at 11:30 am
#3. A phlebotomy must be done at 2pm
Thankfully they're all at the main hospital downtown. Thankfully my husband can drive me and stay with me. Thankfully we have insurance to pay for all this.
Hopefully, prayerfully, my doctors will have answers and solutions can be worked out so that the pain will go away and prayerfully, stay away. I feel so old. So weary. So ready to lie down and let it all go. Maybe that's where I've needed to be and needed to do and just didn't know it until this happened. I need to lie down and rest and let all the other stuff go. If not forever, then at least for awhile.
I sincerely hope and pray you are all well ... mentally, physically, emotionally and spiritually well. For I am learning that when one area is off-balance it affects all the others and if we persist in plodding along without treating the one issue, our seams will fully unravel and we'll have to deal with much more than we expected.
May our Lord bless and keep you. May your needs be met in Him. Thank you for listening and reading.
Monday, May 31, 2010
Prayer need
Please pray for Shawna & her daughter Ashlynn. My Mom called this evening after talking to Shawna's mother ... Ashlynn had a seizure. Please pray for her health. She has a debilitating illness that shortens one's life span.
Also pray for Shawna's parents. They want to sell their home & move to a larger one so that Shawna & Ashlynn can move in with them.
Thank you!
Also pray for Shawna's parents. They want to sell their home & move to a larger one so that Shawna & Ashlynn can move in with them.
Thank you!
Sunday, May 9, 2010
Azaria Update
This is the latest update on Azaria. We appreciate your prayers for this young girl.
UPDATE:
Yesterday I received news from the hospital. Azaria had responded to reflex tests, moving her limbs slightly when prodded. She also opened her eyes momentarily. Also, she is beginning to breathe on her own, though the respirator is assisting her breathing. These are good signs, but the doctors were keen to stress that her condition is still critical. The swelling on her brain is increasing, and the tube to drain the fluid on the brain was dry yesterday morning requiring the doctor to manipulate it to the area in the brain where fluid is collecting.
The Infectious Disease Specialist is 95% sure that she knows which fungus is affecting Azaria, and strong treatment is being administered to combat the strongly suspected fungus, while monitoring the condition of the kidneys, as they can be affected by the strong medication. This specialist cautiously gave Azaria a 20% chance of some form of recovery.
Today, Azaria's condition is much the same. She opened her eyes, but was not focusing, and closed her eyes again. The doctors say that she remains in a coma.
Edwina's two other sisters will arrive soon from South Africa. And tomorrow, the family will move to an apartment nearer to the hospital.
Thank you for your continued prayer. God's peace is here.
Malcolm
UPDATE:
Yesterday I received news from the hospital. Azaria had responded to reflex tests, moving her limbs slightly when prodded. She also opened her eyes momentarily. Also, she is beginning to breathe on her own, though the respirator is assisting her breathing. These are good signs, but the doctors were keen to stress that her condition is still critical. The swelling on her brain is increasing, and the tube to drain the fluid on the brain was dry yesterday morning requiring the doctor to manipulate it to the area in the brain where fluid is collecting.
The Infectious Disease Specialist is 95% sure that she knows which fungus is affecting Azaria, and strong treatment is being administered to combat the strongly suspected fungus, while monitoring the condition of the kidneys, as they can be affected by the strong medication. This specialist cautiously gave Azaria a 20% chance of some form of recovery.
Today, Azaria's condition is much the same. She opened her eyes, but was not focusing, and closed her eyes again. The doctors say that she remains in a coma.
Edwina's two other sisters will arrive soon from South Africa. And tomorrow, the family will move to an apartment nearer to the hospital.
Thank you for your continued prayer. God's peace is here.
Malcolm
Wednesday, May 5, 2010
The Wrath of God
America follows Europe's lead, and as God has blessed the USA greatly with material blessings, we have become more and more hardenend in our thanklessness. We focus upon ourselves, our needs, and revel in our sins. Yes, of course the church has failed to clearly preach the gospel, clearly call for repentance, choosing a man-friendly version of "preaching" that allows you to avoid the scandal of the gospel. But a healthy, thriving church is a blessing on any nation, and the fact is, a nation in love with itself and at war with God does not deserve the blessing of a sound church. The two are intertwined. I truly believe that what we are seeing today with the perversion of marriage, the exaltation of deviancy, etc., is not what will bring the wrath of God, it is the wrath of God.
- Dr. James White
Monday, May 3, 2010
Prayer Need ...
The following comes from missionaries that our church supports in Thailand. Please pray for this young girl and her family. Thank you!
May 3, 2010
Dear Friends and Family,
We are asking for your prayers concerning friends of ours that are missionaries here in Thailand. Their daughter - 14 year old, the same age as our daughter Hannah was admitted in the hospital about a week ago and since then the family has seen her condition only worsen. This is an update that a friend just sent to us so that we would continue to pray for her. Please be praying with us.
Thank you,
Dan and Laurie
UPDATE
I know that Joseph and Edwina feel the strength of your prayers. If any of you (in Thailand) wish to send Joseph and Edwina an SMS (text message) of encouragement, their mobile numbers are as follows: (It's probably better not to call as they will probably be keeping the phones open for calls with family).
Joseph: +66827164982Edwina: +66827164983
Yesterday, was an eventful day.The doctors had hoped that by relieving the pressure on the brain, Azaria's condition would improve. However, she did not wake from the operation and remains in a coma. The swelling on her brain continues. At lunchtime yesterday, the doctor wanted to take a further CAT scan as he was concerned by what he saw during the operation. The CAT scan confirmed his fears that the fungus has penetrated the brain and has reached the brain stem. Due to this, he had to tell Joseph and Edwina that there are no further surgical or medical options remaining. Azaria has lost much of the function of her brain.
Last night, the doctors assessed Azaria's condition and concluded that she was not brain dead, though her condition remains critical. The doctor added that if she survives, she could remain in a vegetative state. At the moment, the life-support equipment is keeping Azaria alive. It has to be said that the medical staff have been excellent. They have kept us well informed, they have shown sensitivity, and they have tried a number of different treatments. Dialysis continues at regular intervals.
Today Azaria's condition remained the same, though she looked slightly more swollen. Last night, Joel (8), Azaria's younger brother came to see his sister. Joseph and Edwina described how Azaria looked and explained that she may not survive. Joel decided that he wanted to see his sister and was in the ICU room for a couple of minutes. It was not easy for him. I traveled into Bangkok with Joel today and he wanted to talk about football and the World Cup in South Africa. When we arrived at the hospital, he said he wanted to see his sister again. He spent a minute with her. Please pray for Joel. These have not been easy months for him.
At the moment, the family are staying at a guesthouse in Bangkok. The youth pastor from their church is staying there with them, and tomorrow, Edwina's sister will arrive from South Africa to be with the family.
May 3, 2010
Dear Friends and Family,
We are asking for your prayers concerning friends of ours that are missionaries here in Thailand. Their daughter - 14 year old, the same age as our daughter Hannah was admitted in the hospital about a week ago and since then the family has seen her condition only worsen. This is an update that a friend just sent to us so that we would continue to pray for her. Please be praying with us.
Thank you,
Dan and Laurie
UPDATE
I know that Joseph and Edwina feel the strength of your prayers. If any of you (in Thailand) wish to send Joseph and Edwina an SMS (text message) of encouragement, their mobile numbers are as follows: (It's probably better not to call as they will probably be keeping the phones open for calls with family).
Joseph: +66827164982Edwina: +66827164983
Yesterday, was an eventful day.The doctors had hoped that by relieving the pressure on the brain, Azaria's condition would improve. However, she did not wake from the operation and remains in a coma. The swelling on her brain continues. At lunchtime yesterday, the doctor wanted to take a further CAT scan as he was concerned by what he saw during the operation. The CAT scan confirmed his fears that the fungus has penetrated the brain and has reached the brain stem. Due to this, he had to tell Joseph and Edwina that there are no further surgical or medical options remaining. Azaria has lost much of the function of her brain.
Last night, the doctors assessed Azaria's condition and concluded that she was not brain dead, though her condition remains critical. The doctor added that if she survives, she could remain in a vegetative state. At the moment, the life-support equipment is keeping Azaria alive. It has to be said that the medical staff have been excellent. They have kept us well informed, they have shown sensitivity, and they have tried a number of different treatments. Dialysis continues at regular intervals.
Today Azaria's condition remained the same, though she looked slightly more swollen. Last night, Joel (8), Azaria's younger brother came to see his sister. Joseph and Edwina described how Azaria looked and explained that she may not survive. Joel decided that he wanted to see his sister and was in the ICU room for a couple of minutes. It was not easy for him. I traveled into Bangkok with Joel today and he wanted to talk about football and the World Cup in South Africa. When we arrived at the hospital, he said he wanted to see his sister again. He spent a minute with her. Please pray for Joel. These have not been easy months for him.
At the moment, the family are staying at a guesthouse in Bangkok. The youth pastor from their church is staying there with them, and tomorrow, Edwina's sister will arrive from South Africa to be with the family.
Sunday, April 25, 2010
Spurgeon Still Speaks
I know of no surer way of a people's perishing than by being led by one who does not speak out straight, and honestly denounce evil. If the minister halts between two opinions, do you wonder that the congregation is undecided? If the preacher trims and twists to please all parties, can you expect his people to be honest? If I wink at your inconsistencies will you not soon be hardened in them?
Like priest, like people. A cowardly preacher suits hardened sinners. Those who are afraid to rebuke sin, or to probe the conscience, will have much to answer for. May God save you from being led into the ditch by a blind guide.
And yet is not a mingle-mangle of Christ and Belial the common religion of the day? Is not worldly piety, or pious worldliness, the current religion of England? (America?) They live among godly people, and God chastens them, and they therefore fear him, but not enough to give their hearts to him. They seek out a trimming teacher who is not too precise and plain-spoken, and they settle down comfortably to a mongrel faith, half truth, half error, and a mongrel worship half dead form, and half orthodoxy.
God have mercy upon men, and bring them out from the world; for he will not have a compound of world and grace. "Come ye out from among them," saith he, "be ye separate: touch not the unclean thing." "If God be God, serve him: if Baal be God, serve him." There can be no alliance between the two. Jehovah and Baal can never be friends. "Ye cannot serve God and Mammon." "No man can serve two masters." All attempts at compromise or comprehensiveness in matters of truth and purity are founded on falsehood, and falsehood is all that can come of them. May God save us from such hateful doublemindedness.
C.H. Spurgeon
Like priest, like people. A cowardly preacher suits hardened sinners. Those who are afraid to rebuke sin, or to probe the conscience, will have much to answer for. May God save you from being led into the ditch by a blind guide.
And yet is not a mingle-mangle of Christ and Belial the common religion of the day? Is not worldly piety, or pious worldliness, the current religion of England? (America?) They live among godly people, and God chastens them, and they therefore fear him, but not enough to give their hearts to him. They seek out a trimming teacher who is not too precise and plain-spoken, and they settle down comfortably to a mongrel faith, half truth, half error, and a mongrel worship half dead form, and half orthodoxy.
God have mercy upon men, and bring them out from the world; for he will not have a compound of world and grace. "Come ye out from among them," saith he, "be ye separate: touch not the unclean thing." "If God be God, serve him: if Baal be God, serve him." There can be no alliance between the two. Jehovah and Baal can never be friends. "Ye cannot serve God and Mammon." "No man can serve two masters." All attempts at compromise or comprehensiveness in matters of truth and purity are founded on falsehood, and falsehood is all that can come of them. May God save us from such hateful doublemindedness.
C.H. Spurgeon
Prayer Needs
Please pray for:
Our friend Nina, that her recovery will be unhindered by any set backs and that she regain her strength in a timely manner.
My Mom isn't feeling well and seems to have a virus of some sort. Is taking antibiotics and resting. That alone tells me she is sick.
Debbie, a lady who was taken to the hospital this morning with a severe headache. She's been experiencing them for a month and doctor's don't know the cause.
For safety for all our children and grandchildren as they go to work and school tomorrow.
Helen, the owner of Me-Maw's Restaurant. We learned yesterday that she's having financial difficulty.
Blessings my friends.
Our friend Nina, that her recovery will be unhindered by any set backs and that she regain her strength in a timely manner.
My Mom isn't feeling well and seems to have a virus of some sort. Is taking antibiotics and resting. That alone tells me she is sick.
Debbie, a lady who was taken to the hospital this morning with a severe headache. She's been experiencing them for a month and doctor's don't know the cause.
For safety for all our children and grandchildren as they go to work and school tomorrow.
Helen, the owner of Me-Maw's Restaurant. We learned yesterday that she's having financial difficulty.
Blessings my friends.
Tuesday, April 20, 2010
Prayer Needs
Dear Ones, would you please say a prayer for the following ladies ...
Jenny (My Mom's cousin) ... isn't doing well mentally and physically.
Jenny's daughter Bess .... needs the Lord
Dana ... a young friend of Jenny's .... she's had both breasts removed because of cancer and is now facing bone cancer.
I thank you!
Blessings.
Jenny (My Mom's cousin) ... isn't doing well mentally and physically.
Jenny's daughter Bess .... needs the Lord
Dana ... a young friend of Jenny's .... she's had both breasts removed because of cancer and is now facing bone cancer.
I thank you!
Blessings.
Wednesday, April 7, 2010
I finished the book "Who Are You To Judge" this morning and my thoughts are even stronger than when I first opened its pages. Every Christian needs to read this book.
Here are more quotes:
"False teachers are driven by their desires and by their greed. People want to hear what pleases them; they will not want to have their sin exposed, but will listen only to those with whom their desires agree. They will set themselves up as their own standard and then find someone to validate them." Page 60
"We are so afraid of being accused of discrimination that we have forgotten that we are to be discriminating."
"Today the enemy is within our gates." Page 61 for both these quotes
"Let it be clearly said that if we want to find the devil in America we must begin by looking behind the pulpits of America; it is in the church and not in the world that the devil does his most deceptive work. Truth mixed with error is sometimes more deadly than errror all by itself." Page 68
"We must keep in mind that the Jesus we want is not necessarily the Jesus we need......
How do we detect this 'other Jesus'? " As you watch and listen to a pastor, evangelist, or prophet, ask: Is the preaching of the Cross central to his ministry? Does he emphasize the need for repentance, holiness and submission to God? Does he preach a Jesus who calls us to suffer, with the promise that He will walk with us through the suffering? Or does he present a Jesus whose primary function is to give us the blessing of heaven right now?" Page 94
"Paul's message and authority came from God; those of his detractors came from Satan. He argued that the marks of a true prophet are suffering and hardship, not health and wealth. Even Jesus did not change the world through miracles but through His suffering." Page 107
"I have often wished that faith healers would look into the television cameras and say to their audience, It is better to be holy than to be healed."
"We are never more like the devil than when we lie." Page 245
Folks, I encourage you once again to get this book, read it prayerfully and see for yourself how much we need discernment in the body of Christ.
May the Lord bless you as we journey toward Home.
Blessings!
Here are more quotes:
"False teachers are driven by their desires and by their greed. People want to hear what pleases them; they will not want to have their sin exposed, but will listen only to those with whom their desires agree. They will set themselves up as their own standard and then find someone to validate them." Page 60
"We are so afraid of being accused of discrimination that we have forgotten that we are to be discriminating."
"Today the enemy is within our gates." Page 61 for both these quotes
"Let it be clearly said that if we want to find the devil in America we must begin by looking behind the pulpits of America; it is in the church and not in the world that the devil does his most deceptive work. Truth mixed with error is sometimes more deadly than errror all by itself." Page 68
"We must keep in mind that the Jesus we want is not necessarily the Jesus we need......
How do we detect this 'other Jesus'? " As you watch and listen to a pastor, evangelist, or prophet, ask: Is the preaching of the Cross central to his ministry? Does he emphasize the need for repentance, holiness and submission to God? Does he preach a Jesus who calls us to suffer, with the promise that He will walk with us through the suffering? Or does he present a Jesus whose primary function is to give us the blessing of heaven right now?" Page 94
"Paul's message and authority came from God; those of his detractors came from Satan. He argued that the marks of a true prophet are suffering and hardship, not health and wealth. Even Jesus did not change the world through miracles but through His suffering." Page 107
"I have often wished that faith healers would look into the television cameras and say to their audience, It is better to be holy than to be healed."
"We are never more like the devil than when we lie." Page 245
Folks, I encourage you once again to get this book, read it prayerfully and see for yourself how much we need discernment in the body of Christ.
May the Lord bless you as we journey toward Home.
Blessings!
Friday, April 2, 2010
Good Friday
As many were astonished at you– his appearance was so marred, beyond human semblance, and his form beyond that of the children of mankind.(Isaiah 52:14 ESV)
Who has believed what he has heard from us? And to whom has the arm of the LORD been revealed? For he grew up before him like a young plant, and like a root out of dry ground; he had no form or majesty that we should look at him, and no beauty that we should desire him.He was despised and rejected by men; a man of sorrows, and acquainted with grief; and as one from whom men hide their faces he was despised, and we esteemed him not. Surely he has borne our griefs and carried our sorrows; yet we esteemed him stricken, smitten by God, and afflicted. But he was wounded for our transgressions; he was crushed for our iniquities; upon him was the chastisement that brought us peace, and with his stripes we are healed. All we like sheep have gone astray; we have turned–every one–to his own way; and the LORD has laid on him the iniquity of us all. (Isaiah 53:1-6 ESV)
He was oppressed, and he was afflicted, yet he opened not his mouth; like a lamb that is led to the slaughter, and like a sheep that before its shearers is silent, so he opened not his mouth. By oppression and judgment he was taken away; and as for his generation, who considered that he was cut off out of the land of the living, stricken for the transgression of my people? And they made his grave with the wicked and with a rich man in his death, although he had done no violence, and there was no deceit in his mouth.(Isaiah 53:7-9 ESV)
Yet it was the will of the LORD to crush him; he has put him to grief; when his soul makes an offering for guilt, he shall see his offspring; he shall prolong his days; the will of the LORD shall prosper in his hand. Out of the anguish of his soul he shall see and be satisfied; by his knowledge shall the righteous one, my servant, make many to be accounted righteous, and he shall bear their iniquities. Therefore I will divide him a portion with the many, and he shall divide the spoil with the strong, because he poured out his soul to death and was numbered with the transgressors; yet he bore the sin of many, and makes intercession for the transgressors.(Isaiah 53:10-12 ESV)
Monday, March 29, 2010
Who Are You To Judge?
Began a new book today .... "You Are You to Judge?" by Erwin Lutzer. I highly recommend it.
Here are some excerpts from the first chapter:
"By and large the world of today has a favorable opinion of Christ only because it misinterprets Him. Remember this axiom: The better the world understand the purpose of Jesus' coming, the more it hates Him. What the world values, Christ despises, what He loves, it hates. Years ago, F.B. Meyer wrote, "Between such irreconcilable opposites as the church and the world, there cannot be but antagonism and strife. Each treasures and seeks what the other rejects as worthless. Each is devoted to ends that are inimical to the dearest interests of the other." And yet, just think, most Christians think it is possible to follow Jesus without turning their backs on the world!"
Here are some excerpts from the first chapter:
"We as Christians have settled down to a comfortable kind of Christianity that demands very little and therefore, in turn, makes very little difference in the wider culture. When the world takes a step in our direction, we embrace it without a twinge of conscience. But a church that has made its peace with the world is incapable of changing it."
"By and large the world of today has a favorable opinion of Christ only because it misinterprets Him. Remember this axiom: The better the world understand the purpose of Jesus' coming, the more it hates Him. What the world values, Christ despises, what He loves, it hates. Years ago, F.B. Meyer wrote, "Between such irreconcilable opposites as the church and the world, there cannot be but antagonism and strife. Each treasures and seeks what the other rejects as worthless. Each is devoted to ends that are inimical to the dearest interests of the other." And yet, just think, most Christians think it is possible to follow Jesus without turning their backs on the world!"
"Older Christians, who knew their hearts better than we knew our own, warned that if we began to tolerate worldliness, however it was defined, we would trip a series of dominoes and the day would come when the church would be filled with "worldly believers". That day is here."
"Why do we find it so difficult to say that some religious views are wrong? Or that some kinds of behavior are sinful? Why do we allow so much of Hollywood into our homes, pretending that we and our families are not influenced by the entertainment industry? Why do we allow false teachers and prophets to flourish without warning the people of God?"
"Truth has disappeared, and few have noticed."
"Mark this well: The love within the church attracts the world; the holiness within the church convicts the world. In the early church, great fear came upon the people when they saw the church committed to discipline and holy living. Unfortunately, as the world observes the church today it might see a commitment to love (which it views as tolerance), but I doubt that it sees a commitment to holy living. Yet we are called to both."
"If the call to holiness is to be obeyed, we must have discernment. To be set apart for God means that we identify the world's values and that we choose to live to the beat of a different drummer. To be in the world but not of it is the challenge before us."
This book should be read by every Christian. Please, please get it and read it prayerfully to uncover the truths we've abandoned. We are to be Holy, because our God is Holy. We are to be set apart for His use, not our own, and not that of the world. We are called out of darkness into marvelous light! We are to BE salt and light to a dying world. This book covers the following:
When You Judge Doctrine
When You Judge False Prophets
When You Judge Miracles
When You Judge Entertainment
When You Judge Appearances
When You Judge Neopaganism
When You Judge Ghosts, Angels, and Shrines
When You Judge Conduct
When You Judge Character
This book can be purchased at http://www.amazon.com/ or http://www.alibris.com/ (both offer discount prices for used books ... I paid about $5.00 for the hardback copy I received yesterday).
Sunday, March 28, 2010
The Wonderful Cross
When I survey the wondrous cross
On which the Prince of glory died,
My richest gain, I count but loss
And pour contempt on all my pride.
See from His head, His hands, His feet
Sorrow and love mingled down
Did ever such love and sorrow meet
Or thorns compose so rich a crown?
Oh the wonderful cross,
Oh the wonderful cross!
All who gather here by grace
Draw near and bless Your Name.
Were the whole realm of nature mine
That were an offering far too small
Love so amazing, so devine
Demands my soul, my life, my all.
Oh the wonderful cross,
Oh the wonderful cross!
Bids me come and die and find
That I may truly live.
Oh the wonderful cross,
Oh the wonderful cross!
All who gather here by grace
Draw near and bless Your Name.
Life so amazing, so devine
Demands my soul, my life, my all
And the beauty and the shame
In the glory of His Name
Oh, the wonderful cross!
Oh the wonderful cross,
Oh the wonderful cross,
Bids me come and die and find
That I may truly live.
Oh the wonderful cross,
Oh the wonderful cross!
All who gather here by grace
Draw near and bless Your Name.
written by
chris tomlin, jd walt, jesse reeves
On which the Prince of glory died,
My richest gain, I count but loss
And pour contempt on all my pride.
See from His head, His hands, His feet
Sorrow and love mingled down
Did ever such love and sorrow meet
Or thorns compose so rich a crown?
Oh the wonderful cross,
Oh the wonderful cross!
All who gather here by grace
Draw near and bless Your Name.
Were the whole realm of nature mine
That were an offering far too small
Love so amazing, so devine
Demands my soul, my life, my all.
Oh the wonderful cross,
Oh the wonderful cross!
Bids me come and die and find
That I may truly live.
Oh the wonderful cross,
Oh the wonderful cross!
All who gather here by grace
Draw near and bless Your Name.
Life so amazing, so devine
Demands my soul, my life, my all
And the beauty and the shame
In the glory of His Name
Oh, the wonderful cross!
Oh the wonderful cross,
Oh the wonderful cross,
Bids me come and die and find
That I may truly live.
Oh the wonderful cross,
Oh the wonderful cross!
All who gather here by grace
Draw near and bless Your Name.
written by
chris tomlin, jd walt, jesse reeves
Friday, March 26, 2010
Thanks Trish & Margie for your comments on my last post. I guess I sounded rather rash and hard and I can be both those things at times.
What I'm seeing is that we're taking what "WE" want the church and its music and scripture, etc., to be, and to have it all meet "our" needs, desires, etc. and give little thought to 'does this glorify GOD?' Does this edify HIS body? Does it bring honor to HIS Name? Was it for this that HE died? Instead we ask ourselves, does it make ME feel good about ... being in church? Going to Bible study? Worshipping? Attending small groups? Helping the poor? If so, I'm all for it! If not, well, I'm outta here.
Many in the church have twisted all things pertaining to scripture so that it will attract people ... make people feel good about themselves ... give them a desire to come back to our church, and so on. Jesus left little room for that discussion. People either followed Him or they didn't.
Since writing that last post I've done some reading about 'Rap' music ... and of course, there are 3 distinct views: those for it; those opposed and those who are neutral. You'll find that with just about anything these days.
For me, I don't like rap music because of the vulgar connotations linked to it's beginnings. Granted, words have apparently changed for those who use it in a christian format, but for me, that beginning shadow lingers over that genre of music. I also don't like the loud, pulsating music that's played in some churches either. I attended a service with that kind of music and couldn't hear myself think, let alone concentrate on 'worship'. By the time the minister was ready to speak, I was ready to go home. A sure sign I am old. I also read more than one article that said "music is neutral" ... but I don't agree. Different music arouses different emotions in everyone who hears it. And it's not all good.
So we'll agree not to agree on this. And I respect your opinions.
As a parent and grandparent I simply find myself wondering .... what are we teaching children and grandchildren? That anything they want to do is okay as long as there is scripture somewhere in it? And, was it for this that Jesus died? Do we dare teach them that to follow Jesus means to deny self, take up their cross and follow Him? That the way Home is narrow and constricted and confining and it's not at all an easy road, nor a popular one? They may not like the song The Old Rugged Cross, but they need to know it was on that type of Cross that our Savior suffered, bled and died. And He didn't do it to the beat of anyone's drum. He did it in obedience to His Father.
Blessings friends. May you have a wonderful week-end.
What I'm seeing is that we're taking what "WE" want the church and its music and scripture, etc., to be, and to have it all meet "our" needs, desires, etc. and give little thought to 'does this glorify GOD?' Does this edify HIS body? Does it bring honor to HIS Name? Was it for this that HE died? Instead we ask ourselves, does it make ME feel good about ... being in church? Going to Bible study? Worshipping? Attending small groups? Helping the poor? If so, I'm all for it! If not, well, I'm outta here.
Many in the church have twisted all things pertaining to scripture so that it will attract people ... make people feel good about themselves ... give them a desire to come back to our church, and so on. Jesus left little room for that discussion. People either followed Him or they didn't.
Since writing that last post I've done some reading about 'Rap' music ... and of course, there are 3 distinct views: those for it; those opposed and those who are neutral. You'll find that with just about anything these days.
For me, I don't like rap music because of the vulgar connotations linked to it's beginnings. Granted, words have apparently changed for those who use it in a christian format, but for me, that beginning shadow lingers over that genre of music. I also don't like the loud, pulsating music that's played in some churches either. I attended a service with that kind of music and couldn't hear myself think, let alone concentrate on 'worship'. By the time the minister was ready to speak, I was ready to go home. A sure sign I am old. I also read more than one article that said "music is neutral" ... but I don't agree. Different music arouses different emotions in everyone who hears it. And it's not all good.
So we'll agree not to agree on this. And I respect your opinions.
As a parent and grandparent I simply find myself wondering .... what are we teaching children and grandchildren? That anything they want to do is okay as long as there is scripture somewhere in it? And, was it for this that Jesus died? Do we dare teach them that to follow Jesus means to deny self, take up their cross and follow Him? That the way Home is narrow and constricted and confining and it's not at all an easy road, nor a popular one? They may not like the song The Old Rugged Cross, but they need to know it was on that type of Cross that our Savior suffered, bled and died. And He didn't do it to the beat of anyone's drum. He did it in obedience to His Father.
Blessings friends. May you have a wonderful week-end.
Sunday, March 21, 2010
Dear Ones, I've not fallen off the earth. Just busy with other things. I have been checking up on your posts however.
Today was my first day back as co-teacher in our children's class at church. I will be teaching once every two weeks and I'm concentrating on getting the children to memorize Scripture. Our verse today is "Your Word I have hidden in my heart that I might not sin against You. Psalm 119:11" I gave examples of how we hide God's words in our hearts ... by reading the verse we want to learn again and again ... by writing the verse again and again ... by applying it to our lives ... by repeating it through-out the day ... by posting it on the fridge or other place where you'll see it daily.
We so need to know God's Word ourselves and to teach it, when we can, to little ones. We live in a day when just about anything goes in Christian circles and I find that sad and scary and it even makes me angry. Take music for example ....I don't believe there's such a thing as "Christian rap" ... how dare we take the music that basically feeds our flesh, add some 'christian' words and call it "Christian"? Weren't the Israelite people given strict instructions on worship? Were Aaron's sons not killed by God for offering strange fire? Who do we think we are? We've been grafted in, we're not His first choice as children; and yet many today live no differently than the world. We look like them, we act like them, we talk like them. For many the only difference is we go to church and they don't.
I know it sounds like I'm ranting and perhaps I am. But I'm tired of what I see ... in the news ... on TV ... now on Facebook ... people who say they're Christian using gutter language (or the abbreviations) and being offended that I object to it. Something's wrong here.
I become weary of TV 'preachers' and others fleecing God's people and I'm tired of God's people falling for it. I read recently of a man who had opportunity to sit with one of the well-known TV evangelists. The TV guy said to this regular guy "Why not sow $100 into my ministry?" Regular guy responds "No!" "Why not? God will give you a $1,000 return for sowing seed into this work." Again the answer "No!" The third time the TV person asks for money with a promise of a 10-fold return the regular guy looks at him and says "Then why don't YOU sow the money into your ministry? You'll be making more than I can give you." A dumb-founded look came upon the TV guy's face and he couldn't respond. That so makes sense to me.
As tired as I am of all this I'm reminded in the Bible (Matthew) that God knows that the enemy has sown tares with the wheat and tells the field hands to leave them alone, that in due time, His angels will come and do the sifting. So I leave it in His capable hands, and take time to examine ME to make sure I'm where I'm supposed to be and leave them all to Him.
Hold fast your confession my friends, test all things, and remember that we're just pilgrims and Home is in view. Thanks for reading.
Blessings.
Today was my first day back as co-teacher in our children's class at church. I will be teaching once every two weeks and I'm concentrating on getting the children to memorize Scripture. Our verse today is "Your Word I have hidden in my heart that I might not sin against You. Psalm 119:11" I gave examples of how we hide God's words in our hearts ... by reading the verse we want to learn again and again ... by writing the verse again and again ... by applying it to our lives ... by repeating it through-out the day ... by posting it on the fridge or other place where you'll see it daily.
We so need to know God's Word ourselves and to teach it, when we can, to little ones. We live in a day when just about anything goes in Christian circles and I find that sad and scary and it even makes me angry. Take music for example ....I don't believe there's such a thing as "Christian rap" ... how dare we take the music that basically feeds our flesh, add some 'christian' words and call it "Christian"? Weren't the Israelite people given strict instructions on worship? Were Aaron's sons not killed by God for offering strange fire? Who do we think we are? We've been grafted in, we're not His first choice as children; and yet many today live no differently than the world. We look like them, we act like them, we talk like them. For many the only difference is we go to church and they don't.
I know it sounds like I'm ranting and perhaps I am. But I'm tired of what I see ... in the news ... on TV ... now on Facebook ... people who say they're Christian using gutter language (or the abbreviations) and being offended that I object to it. Something's wrong here.
I become weary of TV 'preachers' and others fleecing God's people and I'm tired of God's people falling for it. I read recently of a man who had opportunity to sit with one of the well-known TV evangelists. The TV guy said to this regular guy "Why not sow $100 into my ministry?" Regular guy responds "No!" "Why not? God will give you a $1,000 return for sowing seed into this work." Again the answer "No!" The third time the TV person asks for money with a promise of a 10-fold return the regular guy looks at him and says "Then why don't YOU sow the money into your ministry? You'll be making more than I can give you." A dumb-founded look came upon the TV guy's face and he couldn't respond. That so makes sense to me.
As tired as I am of all this I'm reminded in the Bible (Matthew) that God knows that the enemy has sown tares with the wheat and tells the field hands to leave them alone, that in due time, His angels will come and do the sifting. So I leave it in His capable hands, and take time to examine ME to make sure I'm where I'm supposed to be and leave them all to Him.
Hold fast your confession my friends, test all things, and remember that we're just pilgrims and Home is in view. Thanks for reading.
Blessings.
Wednesday, March 10, 2010
I received this via email today from a lady who serves as a missionary in this area, please say a prayer for these needs:
UZBEKISTAN - CHRISTIANS ARRESTED DURING PRIVATE PRAYER MEETING
On 24 January, Midet, a local church leader, and two women were meeting together to pray for their Christian brothers and sisters at Midet's home when police officers arrived, under the pretext of other matters. The police began to search the house, despite not having a search warrant, and found several Christian books. Midet and the women were arrested and taken to the police station, where officers demanded they write a statement about their church and other Christian activities. Midet was beaten and is covered in bruises; the women were also beaten and threatened with being stripped and tortured by electric shocks. Following these threats one of the women wrote a statement admitting that they had been attending a prayer meeting at Midet's home. All three were interrogated by the Office of the Public Prosecutor.
One of the women subsequently issued a complaint that they had been threatened by the police and that their statements had been given under duress. Reports suggest that her sister, who is not a Christian, has also been interrogated by the police, as a way of putting additional pressure on the Christians.
• Pray for Midet and the two women, that the Lord Jesus will heal any physical or emotional distress suffered during their ordeal.
• Pray for all believers in Uzbekistan, that they will be allowed to worship in the privacy of their own homes without fear of harassment, arrest and persecution.
UZBEKISTAN - CHRISTIANS ARRESTED DURING PRIVATE PRAYER MEETING
On 24 January, Midet, a local church leader, and two women were meeting together to pray for their Christian brothers and sisters at Midet's home when police officers arrived, under the pretext of other matters. The police began to search the house, despite not having a search warrant, and found several Christian books. Midet and the women were arrested and taken to the police station, where officers demanded they write a statement about their church and other Christian activities. Midet was beaten and is covered in bruises; the women were also beaten and threatened with being stripped and tortured by electric shocks. Following these threats one of the women wrote a statement admitting that they had been attending a prayer meeting at Midet's home. All three were interrogated by the Office of the Public Prosecutor.
One of the women subsequently issued a complaint that they had been threatened by the police and that their statements had been given under duress. Reports suggest that her sister, who is not a Christian, has also been interrogated by the police, as a way of putting additional pressure on the Christians.
• Pray for Midet and the two women, that the Lord Jesus will heal any physical or emotional distress suffered during their ordeal.
• Pray for all believers in Uzbekistan, that they will be allowed to worship in the privacy of their own homes without fear of harassment, arrest and persecution.
Sunday, March 7, 2010
Ponder this...
‘In the matter of faith-healing, health is set before us as if it were the great thing to be desired above all other things. Is it so? I venture to say that the greatest earthly blessing that God can give to any of us is health, with the exception of sickness. Sickness has frequently been of more use to the saints of God than health has. . . . A sick wife, a newly-made grave, poverty, slander, sinking of spirit, might teach us lessons nowhere else to be learned so well. Trials drive us to the realities of religion.’
C.H. Spurgeon
Saturday, March 6, 2010
Something to think about....
"Discernment is not simply telling the difference between what is right and wrong;
rather, it is the difference between what is right and almost right."
-Charles Spurgeon
Monday, March 1, 2010
Dear Ones,
Please pray for my nephew Jason. He is on drugs again. I just talked with his Dad (my brother) and he's going to see if Jason will agree to go into Life Challenge, a Christian rehab program. Until then, we don't know what God has in store for him, but we do know God's reach isn't short ... He can go where we can't and only He can bring about eternal change.
Thank you very much & Blessings,
Louise
Please pray for my nephew Jason. He is on drugs again. I just talked with his Dad (my brother) and he's going to see if Jason will agree to go into Life Challenge, a Christian rehab program. Until then, we don't know what God has in store for him, but we do know God's reach isn't short ... He can go where we can't and only He can bring about eternal change.
Thank you very much & Blessings,
Louise
Sunday, February 21, 2010
Prayer Need - Melanie
Please pray for a young woman named Melanie. She's about 38 yrs old and has just been diagnosed with MS. She's in school to become a nurse and would greatly like to finish her training and find employment. She is married but they don't have health insurance. They also have one son.
Thank you so much for praying for this woman. She is a Christian.
Blessings!
Louise
Thank you so much for praying for this woman. She is a Christian.
Blessings!
Louise
Monday, February 15, 2010
"When was the last time you heard of a church rebuking members for gossip, admonishing men for the immodest dress of their wives and daughters, or excommunicating a member for adultery? Today’s evangelical church may take a strong stand on fundamental doctrines like the divine nature of Christ and the inspiration of Scripture, but it too often denies this Christ and this inspired Word by not practicing a true Christian lifestyle. The pattern of life of most Christians is so much like the world around them that they blend right in and cannot serve as salt and light".
- Philip Lancaster
Sunday, February 14, 2010
Come Thou Fount
I love the older hymns and I'm going to be posting some of the lyrics on the blog for awhile. I found a web site that gives a devotional and the story behind the hymn and I'd like to share them with you. Hope you are blessed by what you read:
Prone to wander, Lord I feel it,
prone to leave the God I love (from the 3rd stanza of our hymn…)
William Cowper was a well-known minister and hymn writer. (Among the hymns he wrote are "There is a fountain filled with blood" and "God moves in a mysterious way".) Yet, he had wandered. He wrote these words,
"Where is the blessedness I knew
when first I saw the Lord?
Where is the soul-refreshing view
of Jesus and His Word?
What peaceful hours I once enjoyed,
how sweet their memory still,
But they have left an aching void
the world can never fill."
And so have many of us. Some have wandered by flirting with false teaching. Even in the early church, St. Peter warned that "false teachers…will secretly introduce false heresies." 2 Peter 2:1
Others wander by adopting a lifestyle that is at odds with God’s requirements. Recall the sorry story of the prodigal son. And then, think of one of the saddest sentences in the Bible: "Demas, because he loved this world has deserted me having loved this present world…" 2 Timothy 4:10.
And unfortunately, some have wandered from God taking both roads.
Thank God that Jesus came to seek and to save the lost—and the wandering. Remember the shepherd who left the 99 sheep to hunt, even at great peril to himself, the one who had wandered. Remember the woman who had lost a precious coin and would not stop searching until she found it?
The comic strip "Dennis the Menace" features a young boy constantly at odds with Mr. Wilson. Dennis says to his friend Joey, "Don’t every play hide and seek with Mr. Wilson. "He doesn’t seek!"
Thankfully, God does!The dearest idol I have known, whate’er that idol be, Help me to tear it from thy throne, so shall my walk be close with God…
William Cowper knew the joy of being found—and restored. And so can we! But, the most obvious question is: why would any of us "be prone to wander?" For as we know, it only brings grief. Why?
Here’s my heart, O take and seal it, Seal it for thy courts above.
Hymn Story:
Robert Robinson, following the tradition of ministers of the time, wrote "Come, Thou Fount of Every Blessing" as a hymn-poem for the conclusion of his sermon for Whitsunday, 1758. He was 23 years old at the time. It was published the following year in A Collection of Hymns used by the Church of Christ in Angel Alley, Bishopsgate (1759). There has been some speculation that it was written by the Countess of Huntingdon, but it is generally agreed to be the work of Robinson.
Originally "Come, Thou Fount of Every Blessing" had four stanzas. The fourth stanza was omitted by Martin Madan in Psalms and Hymns, 1860 and has not been used since.
The statement in stanza two, "Here I raise my Ebenezer" refers to I Samuel 7:12, "Then Samuel took a stone and set it up between Mizpah and Shen, and called its name Ebenezer, saying, "Thus far the LORD has helped us." Ebenezer is the Hebrew for "Stone of Help." Israel had suffered defeat because of its sin. But the people had repented of their sin, God had helped them and they were victorious. Samuel placed the stone to remind Israel that God had them, their victory was because of Him.
In stanza three, Robinson speaks of being "prone to wonder, prone to leave the God I love". This seems to be a forecast of his later life, when he lapsed into sin, unstableness and involvement with Unitarianism. There is a well-known story of Robinson, riding a stagecoach with a lady who was deeply engrossed in a hymnbook. Seeking to encourage him, she asked him what he thought of the hymn she was humming. Robinson burst into tears and said, "Madam, I am the poor unhappy man who wrote that hymn many years ago, and I would give a thousand worlds, if I had them, to enjoy the feelings I had then."
Here I raise mine Ebenezer;
O to grace how great a debtor
Devotional:
You were like sheep going astray,
But now you have been returned to the Shepherd
and Overseer of your souls. 2 Peter 2:25
Prone to wander, Lord I feel it,
prone to leave the God I love (from the 3rd stanza of our hymn…)
William Cowper was a well-known minister and hymn writer. (Among the hymns he wrote are "There is a fountain filled with blood" and "God moves in a mysterious way".) Yet, he had wandered. He wrote these words,
"Where is the blessedness I knew
when first I saw the Lord?
Where is the soul-refreshing view
of Jesus and His Word?
What peaceful hours I once enjoyed,
how sweet their memory still,
But they have left an aching void
the world can never fill."
And so have many of us. Some have wandered by flirting with false teaching. Even in the early church, St. Peter warned that "false teachers…will secretly introduce false heresies." 2 Peter 2:1
Others wander by adopting a lifestyle that is at odds with God’s requirements. Recall the sorry story of the prodigal son. And then, think of one of the saddest sentences in the Bible: "Demas, because he loved this world has deserted me having loved this present world…" 2 Timothy 4:10.
And unfortunately, some have wandered from God taking both roads.
Thank God that Jesus came to seek and to save the lost—and the wandering. Remember the shepherd who left the 99 sheep to hunt, even at great peril to himself, the one who had wandered. Remember the woman who had lost a precious coin and would not stop searching until she found it?
The comic strip "Dennis the Menace" features a young boy constantly at odds with Mr. Wilson. Dennis says to his friend Joey, "Don’t every play hide and seek with Mr. Wilson. "He doesn’t seek!"
Thankfully, God does!The dearest idol I have known, whate’er that idol be, Help me to tear it from thy throne, so shall my walk be close with God…
William Cowper knew the joy of being found—and restored. And so can we! But, the most obvious question is: why would any of us "be prone to wander?" For as we know, it only brings grief. Why?
Here’s my heart, O take and seal it, Seal it for thy courts above.
Hymn Story:
Robert Robinson, following the tradition of ministers of the time, wrote "Come, Thou Fount of Every Blessing" as a hymn-poem for the conclusion of his sermon for Whitsunday, 1758. He was 23 years old at the time. It was published the following year in A Collection of Hymns used by the Church of Christ in Angel Alley, Bishopsgate (1759). There has been some speculation that it was written by the Countess of Huntingdon, but it is generally agreed to be the work of Robinson.
Originally "Come, Thou Fount of Every Blessing" had four stanzas. The fourth stanza was omitted by Martin Madan in Psalms and Hymns, 1860 and has not been used since.
The statement in stanza two, "Here I raise my Ebenezer" refers to I Samuel 7:12, "Then Samuel took a stone and set it up between Mizpah and Shen, and called its name Ebenezer, saying, "Thus far the LORD has helped us." Ebenezer is the Hebrew for "Stone of Help." Israel had suffered defeat because of its sin. But the people had repented of their sin, God had helped them and they were victorious. Samuel placed the stone to remind Israel that God had them, their victory was because of Him.
In stanza three, Robinson speaks of being "prone to wonder, prone to leave the God I love". This seems to be a forecast of his later life, when he lapsed into sin, unstableness and involvement with Unitarianism. There is a well-known story of Robinson, riding a stagecoach with a lady who was deeply engrossed in a hymnbook. Seeking to encourage him, she asked him what he thought of the hymn she was humming. Robinson burst into tears and said, "Madam, I am the poor unhappy man who wrote that hymn many years ago, and I would give a thousand worlds, if I had them, to enjoy the feelings I had then."
Lyrics:
Come, Thou Fount of every blessing,
Tune my heart to sing Thy grace;
Streams of mercy, never ceasing,
Call for songs of loudest praise.
Teach me some melodious sonnet,
Sung by flaming tongues above.
Praise the mount! I’m fixed upon it,
Mount of God's redeeming love.
Here I raise mine Ebenezer;
Hither by Thy help I’m come;
And I hope, by Thy good pleasure,
Safely to arrive at home.
Jesus sought me when a stranger,
Wandering from the fold of God;
He, to rescue me from danger,
Interposed His precious blood.
O to grace how great a debtor
Daily I’m constrained to be!
Let Thy goodness, like a fetter,
Bind my wandering heart to Thee.
Prone to wander, Lord, I feel it,
Prone to leave the God I love;
Here’s my heart, O take and seal it,
Seal it for Thy courts above.
Original 4th stanza
O that day when freed from sinning,
Original 4th stanza
O that day when freed from sinning,
I shall see Thy lovely face;
Clothed then in blood washed linen
How I’ll sing Thy sovereign grace;
Come, my Lord, no longer tarry,
Take my ransomed soul away;
Send thine angels now to carry
Me to realms of endless day.
Taken from http://www.songsandhymns.org/
Thursday, February 4, 2010
Prayer Need
Please say a prayer for my Aunt Sheila. She's having trouble with a rash that is quite painful and can't get in to see a doctor until the end of this month.
Thank you!
Thank you!
Wednesday, February 3, 2010
Who or what, do you wrestle with?
Scripture clearly tells us that "our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms". Ephesians 6:12
I've heard it said that we face three opponents:
The world, the flesh and the devil.
This morning I saw (again) that I am having difficulty winning the battle with my flesh, how in creation will I win over the other two?
Jesus! Relying totally upon Him. Calling on Him. Depending on His strength, not mine, in whatever situation I face.
Far too often I've attempted to deal with things on my own, in my own strength, forgetting that I have no strength apart from Christ. If I want to see answers that mean anything for eternity, my strength must be His.
May our focus be Him in all we do. May He be honored by our actions and our words. May our thoughts be brought captive to Him.
Blessings pilgrims .. Journey on .. Home is in view!
Monday, February 1, 2010
Gracious Lord,Marvelous Father ..
How in awe I need to be
of Your gifts to me.
The greatest?
Salvation.
Your choosing me to be Yours
long before I could ever say 'yes' to Your call.
How do I understand that?
How do I explain what You have done?
Words fail me.
All I can say is
"He loves me because He loves me"
and I am His
not because of anything I have done,
but solely because He chose me.
Thank You Father.
Thank You for loving me,
for making me Your own.
You truly looked beyond my faults
and saw my need.
You alone have the ability to do that.
You alone have the power to change me.
Thank You.
(c) Louise Moore, Feb. 1, 2010
Friday, January 22, 2010
Sunday, January 17, 2010
This prayer need came from my sister Pat. Wanda is her close friend and Wanda's son Eddie is in Afghanistan. Please keep this young man and all our military in your prayers. Thank you.
"Eddie just called. He is a Gunny (Gunnery) Sergeant and is an operations chief of a company of Marines. He is over a truck company. I hate that, because he will be out on the roads, where they plant bombs.
He didn't know where he was and he doesn't know where he is going. His troops have not come in yet but when they do they will not be coming from his base in North Carolina. He is at Camp Leatherneck, Afghanistan. That is all he knew. I had hoped he was in supply but instead he is over 300 plus troops that will be patroling roads and going into homes.
He said as soon as the troops arrive that he will not be able to call. So far he has been able to communicate by facebook and phone. After his men get there it will be awhile before anyone will hear from him. I looked up where he is on the computer and it is awful.
Pray for him, please.
Love,
Wanda "
"Eddie just called. He is a Gunny (Gunnery) Sergeant and is an operations chief of a company of Marines. He is over a truck company. I hate that, because he will be out on the roads, where they plant bombs.
He didn't know where he was and he doesn't know where he is going. His troops have not come in yet but when they do they will not be coming from his base in North Carolina. He is at Camp Leatherneck, Afghanistan. That is all he knew. I had hoped he was in supply but instead he is over 300 plus troops that will be patroling roads and going into homes.
He said as soon as the troops arrive that he will not be able to call. So far he has been able to communicate by facebook and phone. After his men get there it will be awhile before anyone will hear from him. I looked up where he is on the computer and it is awful.
Pray for him, please.
Love,
Wanda "
Devotional by Roy Lessen
The Lord: Yahweh. The Eternal. Jehovah. I Am. The self-Existent One. The God of forever and ever.
Is: Not will be one day. Not someday. Not was a long time ago. Is now, at this very moment—as I draw each breath, as I take each step, as I face each circumstance of life.
My: Not just someone else’s. Not just the pastor’s. Not just the missionary’s. Not just the people in the Bible. Personal God. My God. Knowing me intimately, watching me carefully, loving me fully.
Shepherd: Pastor. The One who tends, keeps, guards, guides. The Good Shepherd; The Great Shepherd; The Chief Shepherd. The One who leads. The One who feeds. Life giver. Care giver. Watching every moment; protecting in every situation; providing every need. Laying down His life. Giving His all. Seeking me. Carrying me. Holding me close.
I: His hand is on me. I am the apple of His eye. I am His beloved. I am His child. I am His possession. I belong to Him. I am in His hands. I am in His thoughts. I am on His heart.
Shall Not: Never! Not once! Not in any circumstance; not in any trial; not at any age. I am certain, sure, persuaded, unmistaken, absolutely confident of His “Yes” to me.
Want: He is my supply. He is my provider. He is my provision. I shall not be given a stone instead of bread. I shall not come up empty, be destitute, find out that I have been forsaken. In Him, my Lord, my God, my Shepherd, my Pastor, I find no lack.
Sunday, January 10, 2010
Tuesday, January 5, 2010
Hi All,
Just a note to let you know I'm feeling better. Thank you for praying for me. I had bloodwork today and will go tomorrow to see a neurologist and have an appointment with a gastroenterologist on Feb. 1.
Very thankful to be feeling more 'normal' once again.
Thank you again, and may the Lord bless.
Louise
Just a note to let you know I'm feeling better. Thank you for praying for me. I had bloodwork today and will go tomorrow to see a neurologist and have an appointment with a gastroenterologist on Feb. 1.
Very thankful to be feeling more 'normal' once again.
Thank you again, and may the Lord bless.
Louise
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