An update on me...
Went to dr. yesterday for yearly physical and to tell her about some issues I'm dealing with. She wouldn't give me the flu shot because my lungs are wheezing & I'm too close to the infection of last week. I had a chest exray done and went back this morning for fasting blood work ... lots of it.
Seems there's a problem with my feet that, as she put it, "has her stumped". I'm to go see my hemotologist asap and am waiting for them to fit me in downtown. If that can't happen soon, my reg. dr. will get me in with another specialist. My feet turn a purplish/blue color when I sit or stand or walk. They are relatively normal when I'm in bed or have them propped up. (There's the answer ... stay in bed!) The pulse in said feet is good s and the oxygen levels in said feet are within normal range. They look bad ... really bad and at times they hurt quite a bit. She also put me on a prescription of Prednisone to hopefully stop the lung inflammation and wheezing. No wonder Trish calls me Weeze ... I do. I've been called that for years by those who love me.
I wanted to take my grandgirls to church tonight but decided it's best I stay home and stay away from the other little children who are there. Also best for the girls too I guess. I heard today that a suspected case of the swine flu is in one of the Southgate elementary schools.
Do any of you deal with thinking you have a lack of faith in certain areas? I do. I found myself thinking just today that if I had enough faith, I'd go to church regardless of what's going on in my body. I'd trust God to keep me safe and keep the girls safe too. Then what I call common sense seeps in and says "Use the brain God gave you Louise ... you're still dealing with asthma ... you're wheezing .. you're on Prednisone (while it works for the lungs it also makes me susceptible for secondary infections and makes me tired & hyper at the same time)...you're still doing breathing treatments 3-4 times a day, etc., etc., etc."
So today common sense has won. I am staying in and the girls are too. I can use this time to rest, read and pray for others. I can be grateful to God for insurance that pays for all this medication & dr's visits. I can be grateful too for my Fred who cooks for me and cares for me. I can realize that I cannot do it all. Not ever. And most importantly, I can face the truth that God knows about all this ... He loves me and directs my steps ... and He loves my grandgirls far more than I do. I can trust Him to care for them and for me all the time, forever and ever and ever.
Thanks for reading. I love you all very much.